Hobo #1, to chick passerby: Hey! Good morning! You should smile more — you’re beautiful!
Hobo #2: She’s not that pretty.
Hobo #1: I beg to differ!
Hobo #2: Hey, man, if you want to go worship her preppy ass, go for it, but she’s not that special.
–Tompkins Square Park
Teen cashier: I’ll need to see some ID.
Female shopper: Ok, here you go.
Teen cashier: [Looks at woman’s driver’s license.] Oh wow, so you’re an organ donor?
Female shopper: Yes.
Teen cashier: Oh my god! Which organ did you donate?
–Trader Joe’s, Union Square
Overheard by: rko
Guy #1: I want to sing into an oscillating fan and record it.
Guy #2: Do you think you’re the first person to think of that? That’s like saying the kid on Project Runway invented the word “fierce”.
–10th St & 1st Ave
Hobo to passerby: Sir, can you spare a thousand dollars?
Passerby: Haha… Oh you’re serious.
–21st & 3rd
Overheard by: Paul
Guy #1: What do you think about calories? I don't believe they're real.
Guy #2 (humoring him): Yeah…
Guy #1: Yeah, I don't know about atoms either.
–F Train
Student: Have you seen the show Freaks and Geeks?
Dean: Yes. It reminds me of all of you!
–Bard High School Early College
Five-year-old boy to mother: It smells like penis in here!
Embarrassed mother: “Peanuts”. Honey, you mean “peanuts”.
Five-year-old boy: No. Penis! (points to his crotch)
–Duane Reade in Penn Station
Overheard by: Dawn D.
Kid #1, to kid #2 on bike: Come on, let me ride on the pegs.
Kid #2: No.
Kid #1: Fine, I’ll ride you.
–129th St, Rockaway
Overheard by: Robert
Girl #1: Oh, Yahoo Japan, I thought it said Yoohoo.
Girl #2: What’s Yahoo? Is that a place in Japan?
–Dorms, Fordham University
Overheard by: MeganB
Gangsta: What was I saying?
Super preppie, impatiently: So you were in the handcuffs…
–6th Ave & 8th St
