The Gates Changed New York Forever

Elderly woman: Excuse me, do you know where 81st Street is? We’re trying to get to the highest point in the park to see The Gates.

A NYer points out the way. After she leaves, he says: I’m pretty sure I gave her the wrong directions, but I think she’s high enough.

–The Ramble

Overheard by: Nathan K. Claus

Guy: Man, this will really put New York back on the map.

–The Gates

Suit: Excuse me, I wanted to ask you about your [big orange] wig. Are you advocating your support for The Gates or are you commenting on how crazy and trivial they are?
Guy: Uh…what wig?

–The Gates

Overheard by: Greg Rutter

Boy: Mom! Was that “art”?
Mother: No, Michael. That was laundry.

–Central Park

Overheard by: Darko Vraither

Old woman #1: Isn’t it lovely?
Old woman #2: Well, I wouldn’t call it art, but I’m certainly glad New York has something to amuse it during the month of February.

–MoMA roof

Overheard by: Michael Bracy

Posted on July 17, 2020
Arts & Letters, Directions, Fashion, NYC Geography, Only in New York, Questions, Time, Wednesday One-Liners, Wednesday One-Liners Vary

It’s a Cultural Thing

College student #1: You look tired, what have you been doing?
College student #2: I’ve just been jogging.
College student #1: Like that? Why do Chinese people always go jogging in jeans?

–Marshak Hall, City College

Overheard by: liselle boyett

Posted on June 30, 2020
City College, College, Fashion, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style

Where Else Can You Get Labia Jewelry on the Street?

Man selling glasses on the street: Would you like a piercing today?
Woman on phone: Hang on… What?
Man selling glasses: Would you like to get a piercing today?
Woman: Would I like a…? No, I would not like to get a piercing today. (back into phone) I love New York.

–St. Mark's St

Overheard by: Logan

Posted on June 23, 2020
Fashion, Offers and requests, On Cell, Only in New York, Union Square and East Village, Vendors & Street Performers, Women

Lady In Red

Woman (wearing red pants & with red fingernails): I just made the greatest discovery: if I always dress in red, then I will always match and always look good! I’m now in the middle of getting rid of all my old clothing and buying only red clothing.

— Subway

Posted on June 5, 2020
Colors, Fashion, On the Subway, One-liners, Stupidity, Women

She’s on Coke, Duuuh!

Bus driver: That’s what crack will do to you.
Crazy lady: What? Crack? Did you say I’m on crack? Hell no. I have too much ass to be on crack. I have too much jewelry to be on crack. You see these? They’re real diamonds. You hear these? They’re keys jingling – keys to my house. Next time you see someone having a bad day, just say ‘I guess they’re having a bad day’ not ‘they’re on crack. Pray for me and I’ll pray for you!

–125th & Amsterdam

Overheard by: ColumbiaCat

Posted on June 2, 2020
Bus Drivers, Crazies, Fashion, Hard Drugs, Harlem & Morningside Heights, On the Bus, Religion

Barely Believing His Good Fortune, Mr. Guccione Handed Her Two Business Cards

Man: Hey, miss, would you be interested in modeling? You have a great look! Very original and unique!
Girl: I’m a twin.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: alyssa

Posted on May 22, 2020
Family Ties, Fashion, Penn Station

Uggs Are So Over

Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: Grazie!
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Why didn’t you wear the right shoes?
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: No, no, these are fine.
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Aaaah, blow me. They’re terrible.

–66th between Columbus & Central Park West

Overheard by: MojoSaves

Posted on April 17, 2020
Fashion, Manhattan, Pop Culture, TV, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

Ego & Hubris & Wednesday One-liners

Drunk girl: Sometimes, when I look at myself through the microscope of cold, hard objectivity, I think to myself, “God, you are awesome!”

–47th & 9th

Overheard by: Nick Salvato

Posted on March 9, 2020
Body Parts, College, Columbia (& Barnard), Dating, Drinking & Drunk People, Fashion, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Hipsters, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, One-liners, Queers, Relationships, Sex & Relationships, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

A Few Sucky Wednesday One-Liners

Brunette woman yelling on cell: Look, I'm 24 fucking years old. If I want to suck dick all day, that's my business!

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Blank Slater

Girl on cell: First you go, "accckkk… accckkkk" (makes choking sounds) Then you have a mouth fulla cum!

–Madison Ave

Overheard by: I.R.

50-something woman, screaming into cell: Listen, asshole, I'm not some cheap slut you can call whenever you need someone to suck you off, I have a job!

–Penn Station Taxi Line

Black man in phone booth: You better suck that juicy white cock, and get me that perfume, bitch!

–7th Ave & 35th St

Posted on December 15, 2019
Age/Aging, All Wednesday One-Liners, BJs, Black People, Body Parts, Brooklyn, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Choke, Cum, Fashion, Girls, Insults, Jobs & Careers, Money & Class, Nicknames & name calling, Offers and requests, On Cell, One-liners, Penis, Penn Station, Prostitution, Street, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Wishes & desires, Women

But I’m a Sucker for Anything Involving Kittens

Large black guy #1: Yo, check out that chick’s earrings.
Large black guy #2: Damn, they even match her outfit.
Large black guy #1: That’s, like, a whole new level of matching.
Large black guy #2, to girl: Yo, did you make those?
Girl: No, my sister did.
Large black guy #2: I reeeally like those.

–1 train

Overheard by: i like them too

Posted on November 11, 2019
Black People, Compliments, Default, Fashion, Fat People, Girls, Gripes, On the Subway

Fashion