Wannabe thug paging through a Playboy, to another: Yo, check that shit out! Those are seven hundred bucks a pair. They got diamonds and crystals and shit in them!
–A train, W 4th St
Wannabe thug paging through a Playboy, to another: Yo, check that shit out! Those are seven hundred bucks a pair. They got diamonds and crystals and shit in them!
–A train, W 4th St
Teen girl #1: I really want some sa’mores. We should totally make sa’mores.
Teen girl #2: Sa’mores? It’s ‘s’mores,’ not ‘sa’mores’! Sa’mores! Sa’mores… Yeah… Sa’moron!
–81st & 3rd
Overheard by: i love smores
Girl: I’m afraid of water.
Dude #1: I don’t get that. I mean, aren’t we all like 70 percent water or something? Or wait, is that only some people?
Dude #2: She’s talking about being afraid of the ocean, not drinking water.
Dude #1: Ohhh.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: standing in front of them, unfortunately
Asian girl helping blonde with Japanese assignment: Okay, now tell me about something you would eat.
Blonde: Uhhh… Watashiwa inu o tabemasu…
Asian, exasperated: You don’t eat dogs!
Blonde: Well, in Japan you do!
–Outside University Restaurant, University Place
Dude #1: I can’t believe that random-ass bitch was there.
Dude #2: She was there?
Dude #1: Yeah. Now I have to call her.
–6 train
Overheard by: tricia
Girl #1: I can’t wait ’til we get to college. We’re going to be different people. And, like, we’re going to be the best dressed people on campus. We’re gonna be awesome!
Girl #2: Yeah. No one will dress better than us!
Girl #1: Yeah. So awesome!
–Macy’s dressing room, 34th St
Overheard by: evie24
Woman: I’m glad it’s starting soon. I could use some laugh therapy.
Friend: Um, it’s not really a funny play…
Woman: Yeah — I was kidding.
Friend: Oh.
–Waiting to see King Lear, The Public Theater
Overheard by: could use it, too
Girl #1: The following night we had sex.
Girl #2: Sex?
Girl #1: Yeah, but not normal sex.
Girl #2: What do you mean?
Girl #1, lowering voice: Butt sex.
Girl #2: In the butt?! What did he do?!
Girl #1: Nothing, it’s just tighter.
Girl #2: You’d have to be super drunk to do that.
Girl #3: Yeah, every time I’ve done it, I have been.
–96th & Lex
Overheard by: jc
Loud woman: That nigga stupid!
Friend: You right.
Loud woman: Nah, he worse than stupid. That nigga retarded! Re-tar-ded!
Friend: He didn’t even get good grades in college!
–F train
Girl #1: Oh my god, my roommate is so weird. She keeps farting, but I don’t smell anything.
Girl #2: She must be anorexic.
Girl #1: True! I didn’t think of that. I’m so glad I’m friends with someone that got a scholarship!
–Starbucks, 51st & Broadway
Overheard by: Or she’s bullemic.
