Gay guy: I don't know, like, I've just had such a bad week, it's been terrible.
Friend: It's like A Series of Unfortunate Events, dude!
Gay guy: You're so right. Count Olaf is like, all up in my grill!
–8th & University
Overheard by: sophie
Gay guy: I don't know, like, I've just had such a bad week, it's been terrible.
Friend: It's like A Series of Unfortunate Events, dude!
Gay guy: You're so right. Count Olaf is like, all up in my grill!
–8th & University
Overheard by: sophie
Teenage boy #1: Yeah, he's gay.
Teenage boy #2: I don't know, he's always hanging out with girls.
Teenage boy #3: Gay guys always hang out with girls! I don't get it! What's in it for them?
–Q Train
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Petite Asian woman on cell: And that's when I'll cut off his penis!
–East Village
Overheard by: Katie
Guy in the middle of group photo: Okay, now everybody take your cocks out.
–The Luxor Hotel, Columbus & 81st St
Loud matronly woman on cell, exasperated: Whose penis was on your thing?
–3rd & 16th
Overheard by: Joe & Eliz
Young lesbian on cell: She kept yelling "penis!" the whole time we were doing it… Should I call her?
–Long Island City
Overheard by: Sunny
20-something gorgeous gay man wearing tiara: He wouldn't tell me where he was, so then I said “let me smell ya dick!”
20-something drop-dead hot girl: Something's rotten in Denmark.
–Bleecker & W 4th
Guy #1: He knew he was gay!
Guy #2: He didn't know he was. He couldn't accept it.
Guy #1: Well, he accepted enough to suck a dick!
–24th & 7th
12-year-old girl holding plaid button-down shirt: Wow, I can't wait to be a hipster!
Dyke in similar plaid shirt: When did “dyke” become “hipster”?
–Marshall's
Overheard by: Starisla
Floozy #1, at fancy restaurant: I don't know if I can date him. Some of his dance moves were just not what I would call “heterosexual.”
Floozy #2: Yeeeeah, but it's really hard to dance heterosexually to house music.
–Monkey Bar, Midtown East
Fat short college guy: Yo, buddy. I've been meaning to ask, but…
Handsome tall college guy: Yeah?
Fat short college guy: If I was gay, would you give me a pity fuck?
Handsome tall college guy: Probably.
–Times Square
Guy #1: Has Mark* confirmed that he's coming?
Guy #2: I dunno, I haven't checked Facebook in a while.
Passerby: That's cuz you're gay.
–12th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: casey
Demonstrator on microphone: I used to hate homosexuals, I used to be the one who beat up homosexuals. Now that I found Jesus I love homosexuals!
Man next to him, on megaphone: Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. I have a megaphone!
–Union Square
