Girl #1: I don’t know, she’s weird!
Girl #2: Where is she from, anyway?
Girl #1: Sweden, I think… She’s, like, an exchange student.
Girl #2: Sweden? What is that, anyway — a religion?
Girl #1: Oh, please, it’s a country, dumbass.
Girl #2: You were the one to say that Canada was a part of Arizona.
–Times Square
Man: Where are you from?
Boy: (silence)
Man: If someone asks you that, you say you are from Earth.
Boy: Earth.
Man: And then if someone asks you where on Earth, you say, “a continent.”
–1 Train
Overheard by: fayfayryryr2h
Young Asian woman: That’s why your country has such a low birth rate. In Korea the men just club women over the head and drag them home.
Young Asian man: [Pausing] I don’t believe you.
–Tosca, The Met
Overheard by: busyboy
Tour guide trying to attract tourists: Hello! Great bus ride for tourists, only $30!
Girl: I'm not a tourist, I'm a student at Fordham.
Tour guide: Fordham's in England, you dumb bitch.
–Times Square
Girl #1: I wonder where Austria is.
Girl #2: It must be by Australia, because they sound the same.
–Bus
Overheard by: David
Crazy old hobo, holding up bags and drawing: Where's the moon? Where's the moon? If the earth is in Columbus Circle, then the moon would be on 64th and Central Park West! Come see my exhibition!
Hipster teen surrounded by giggling friends: Is your exhibition inside those bags?
Crazy old hobo: No, those are Michelle Obama's dresses. You want to be smart with me? Why don't you be smart and become an exhibitionist?
Hipster teen surrounded by giggling friends: Do you know what “exhibitionist” means?
Crazy old hobo: Of course! It's someone who goes to museums every day!
–1 Train
Random hipster guy: So yeah, I’ve lived here forever and I don’t know any Russians. I really want to know one.
Farm stand sales girl: Really? That’s so funny! I just met one a few days ago at some bar. I think he gave me his number.
Random hipster guy: Awesome! Would you give me his number? I really want to know a Russian. I mean, I’m not gay or anything, I just want to know him. You wanna give me his number?
Farm stand sales girl: Sure, here.
–SoHo Farmer’s Market
Overheard by: Kate
(at an academic conference on Renaissance aesthetics)
Student #1: You know it's gonna be good when all the speakers are British.
Student #2: Pretty sure they're Australian.
Student #1: Oh… Posers!
–Gallatin Building, NYU
Overheard by: harker
Hobo: Hey, where you from, man?
Tourist #1 (wearing fingerless gloves): England.
Hobo: I knew you ain't from round here, cos I ain't never seen gloves like that before
(hobo walks away)
Tourist #2: You should have told him they're really popular with tramps in England.
–105th & Broadway
Woman #1: Chile? Isn't that in Mexico?
Woman #2: No, it's its own country.
Woman #1: Really? All by itself?
–Whole Foods, 14th St
Overheard by: Linda Keegstra
