(passengers start closing bus windows because of heavy rain)
Girl #1: That window's still open.
Girl #2 (reaching over sleeping girl and closing it): Oh my god, I feel like I'm her savior.
Girl #1: Uh-huh.
Girl #2: But now it's really hot. Should we open a window?
Girl #1: Fine. (reaches over and opens the window next to the sleeping girl)
Girl #2: You're evil.
Girl #1: Yeah, like you weren't thinking of doing the same exact thing.
–Bronx Science Vallo Bus
Girl: The polar ice caps are melting…
Guy #1: Yeah, ’cause of global warming!
Guy #2: Um…it’s summertime.
–F train
Overheard by: cupcake
Young man: Man, is it hot out here today!
Older man: Yes, it is. I can’t believe I can still feel the sun on my head in the shade.
–Wall St
Logistical genius: If the power goes out and we lose the air conditioning, we can always use the fans.
–SoHo
Dude on cell: Am I keeping it real? I’m wearing a Goddamn blazer, and it’s 100 degrees out. Of course I’m keeping it real!
–Hudson & Leroy
Conductor: Now, I know it’s real hot out there, so this is what I do when I’m walking down the streets of New York and trying to keep cool. I just sing this little song to myself: “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, just like the ones I used to know”…All right, you all, this is 68th Street. Keep cool out there.
–A train
Overheard by: Chloe
Woman to her son: It’s too hot for stupidness.
–59th St
Proselytizer: You think this is hot? Hell is hot!
–Uptown N train
Overheard by: Cpt. Kate
Guy on cell: How you been doing in this heatwave?…That’s hot…Well, now I’m getting all hot, thinking of my hot, sweaty cousin.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Nozomi
Dedicated employee: Frankly, the only reason I’m going in to work today is because they have better air conditioning than I do.
–Manhattan bound R train
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Latino: It’s fucking warm, yo!
Building custodian, in heavy Trinidadian accent: So it is, mon! So it is!
Latino: The world is going to end very soon, yo!
Building custodian: Maybe so, my brotha!
Latino: No! I’m fucking serious, yo!
–151 W 26th St, Chelsea
Overheard by: jairoski
Teacher: My father always told me, "Never run away from a fight. If the guy's bigger than you, hit him. If he gets back up, hit him again. If he gets back up again, hit him with a garbage can. If he still gets back up, run like hell, 'cause this dude's gonna kill you!"
–Stuyvesant High School
Teacher: Okay. Emergency procedures. If the fire bell rings, we run like hell.
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: Goober
Chinese teacher (referring to Sichuan earthquake): They had a saying after the earthquake happened that originates from a male part. "People are supposed to rise up, and get hard!" …and be strong.
–Bard High School Early College
Math teacher: Give me your little men!
–Spence School
English teacher: I could be charged with child abuse in some states for teaching grammar in 90-degree weather. (student is silent) I'm not going to hit you.
–Brooklyn Tech
Overheard by: Julie
Girl #1: It's really warm, and I really want to take these pants off.
Girl #2: That shirt's long enough to cover your butt, and you're wearing tights under it, right?
Girl #1: Yeah, but still. I'm not white.
–Stuyvesant High School
African man: Does it feel hot here?
African-American woman: I dunno. My boobs ain't sweatin'.
–F Train
Overheard by: Russ Wall
Balding 40-something: I’m a coed! Don’t laugh — I am a hot coed!
–Columbia University
Drunken cheerleader to fat friend: We’re the hottest non-lesbian girl couple ever.
–68th & Lex
Thug to friends: Yo, it’s too damn hot to be messin’ with the females today.
–Union St & 4th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: Confabulation Nation
Teen program chick: … And even if it’s really, really hot outside, you are not supposed to sleep with a fan directly on you.
–Columbia University
Girl #1: This says it's 99 degrees out.
Girl #2: Really? I would have thought it's 100 degrees.
–32nd St & Madison Ave
