Guy #1 eating an ice cream cone: Look at these babes.
Guy #2 eating an ice cream cone: Look at these jugs.
Guy #1: Look at these bombs.
Guy #2: Holy shit! Russian Scuds!
Guy #1: Look at these torpedos!
Guy #2: Look at these fun bags!
Guy #1: Oh yeah! Oh yeah! What a babe!
Guy #2: Yeah, but her friend has to do something with that can.
–Broadway & 22nd
Overheard by: Eric Wenstrom
Girl #1: …and I will totally sell you my old shuffle, cheap.
Girl #2: I don’t know…
Guy: Fuck that, iTunes sucks! All iProducts suck!
Girl #2: Shh! You might offend the girl with the iPod.
Guy: Fuck her! She can’t hear us with those ear things in!
–F train
Overheard by: Girl with the iPod
Guy: That the fucking bitch that called the cops on me! That fucking bitch called the cops! You! White trash! White trash! White trash!
Chick: I always knew you were a bigot.
–St. George, SI
Drunk guy: you’re not taking money out, you’re taking each other out!
Pair of fruitfucks!
–15th & 8th
Drunk guy: Don’t you fuck with me!
Sober woman: What?
Drunk guy: You sleep with a different guy every night!
Sober woman: I do not. What are you talking about?
Drunk guy: You love…me. You want to marry…me.
Sober woman: This is ridiculous. I’ve had enough. I don’t have to take this anymore. Goodbye!
She leaves. He turns to the next table.
Drunk guy: Yeah, did you see that girl who just left? I just dumped her. Can I buy you two a drink?
–Rosie O’Grady’s, 7th Avenue
Guy #1: Oh my god, I know. I heard Versace is having a huge sale!
Man: Shut up, you damn queer!
Guy #2: He’s just mad because he can’t even spell Versace.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Nikki Starr
Guy: Stop being such a Debbie Downer.
Girl: Stop watching such shitty tv shows.
–Q train
Lady: A lot of people came off this train. Why aren’t you people moving in?
Guy: There’s a baby stroller in the back.
Lady: Well, they should move it. Move it over to the side!
Guy: Move a tiny infant baby? Everybody, look! This lady right here is the Antichrist! Move the baby? You the Antichrist!
–6 train
Teen girl: What the fuck is a morning rubber? I’ve got to get a morning rubber.
Chick: God, you are such a virgin! You put a morning rubber on a morning glory, for God’s sake.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Pi.
