Kids

Random lady to pregnant Indian woman: It's a girl… Girls make your ass look huge.
Pregnant Indian woman: Oh… But, it's a boy, I just went to doctor.
Random lady: Did your doctor see your huge ass?

–Cortelyou Rd, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Taylor

Yuppie mom: Look, honey, that girl holds her daddy’s hand when they cross the street.
Little girl: What a slut!
Yuppie mom: What?! Where did you learn that phrase?!
Little girl: Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!

–8th & 2nd

Overheard by: What a Skank

Toddler being pushed through park: Music!
Hobo, playing guitar: Give me cookies!

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Anna P.

Truly urban son: Look, mom, an eagle!
Mom: No, Gabe, it's just a pigeon.

–The Bronx

Overheard by: Natasha

Headline by: Brian

Runners-Up:
· “But It’s a Bronx Pigeon, So It Acts Like an Eagle” – PeterG
· “Kudos to the Science Teachers at P.S. 51” – Los
· “The Cash-Strapped Bronx Zoo Wasn’t Fooling Anyone” – Coyoty
· “The True Symbol Of America” – BabakganoosH
· “This Is the Bronx, Let Him Dream…” – Lacey

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Little girl: Mommy, I’m going to marry Daddy.
Mom: Sorry, honey, turns out Daddy doesn’t like girls. Daddy likes other daddies.

–A train

Man on cell, authoritatively: Ejaculate!

–14th b/w 3rd & 4th

Mother to curious little girl reaching out to touch Wall Street bull's testicles: No! (yanks her away)

–Bowling Green

Woman shouting across a grassy field: Slutbots!

–McCarren Park, Brooklyn

(intercom beeps 10 times)
Train conductor, over intercom: Shit.
(intercom continues to beep)

–Hudson Line Train

Man on bike speeding along Brooklyn Bridge walkway: Pussyhoooollleeeeee!

–Brooklyn Bridge

Quiet, older gentleman sipping coffee, leafing through newspaper: Motherfuckers!

–Barnes & Noble Coffee Bar, Broadway

Overheard by: Suze V

(little boy #1 is playing a Nintendo)
Little boy #1: Yeah, that final boss was pretty hard, but I’m glad it was a sorceress, not a sorcerer; it’s a well known fact that they’re more powerful.
Little boy #2: It’s true.

–6 Train

Overheard by: florian

Mom: “Cucumber”.
Boy: C-u-c-u-m-b-e-r.
Mom: Very good. Ah, ah, “barbershop”.
Boy: B-a-r-b-e-r-s–
Mom: No, no.
Boy: B-e-r–
Mom: No, you were right, b-a-r–
Boy: B-a-r-b-e–
Mom: It’s like a lady’s name, cause it’s a hair place.
Boy: B-a-r-b-a-r-a-s-h-o-p?
Mom: Close, it’s b-a-r-b-r-a-s-h-o-p.

–1 train

Overheard by: Daniel Drucker

Dad: So, that wasn't so bad was it?
Young son: I guess, but I'd still rather be watching the Jets game.

–Coming out of Wicked, Broadway

Little boy to dad: Do you like Obama?
Dad: Yes, son, I like Obama.
Boy: You like Obama, mom?
Mom: Yes, I like Obama.
Boy: You like Obama?
Sister: I like Obama.
Boy: Hey, people, you like Obama?
Random people: Yes, we do.

–116th St