Screaming mom: You have no idea what goes on in this world! Open your eyes and get a goddamn clue already!
Laughing son, ignoring her: Derrr…
–Hudson & Bank
Overheard by: Anna Wolinsky
Screaming mom: You have no idea what goes on in this world! Open your eyes and get a goddamn clue already!
Laughing son, ignoring her: Derrr…
–Hudson & Bank
Overheard by: Anna Wolinsky
Little boy: It's a monkey!
Mom: It's bush.
–18th St & 5th Ave
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #1: … And there’d be football players in the middle of nowhere!
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #2: In December…
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #1, in deep, slow voice: In my tummy.
–Central Park South
Overheard by: A. Card
Father: Do you want a hatchet?
Four-year-old son: I need an axe!
Father: You sure?
Four-year-old son: Yeah!
Father: Okay!
–Lafayette & Vanderbilt, Brooklyn
Overheard by: off white
20-something woman to friend: Man, can I just tell you how absolutely bizarre coffee shop conversations are in this area?! I am never ever getting married if this is the sort of stuff married women talk about all day.
–Smith & Bergan
Overheard by: Mako Shark
30-something to older woman: I can’t get married yet! I haven’t experienced even… half of the women in the world yet!
–86th & Broadway
Overheard by: Carol
Tween boy getting into the face of another tween boy: (loudly) I’ll be your fucking wife!
–Morgan’s Market
Overheard by: Akiko
Little boy: We saw a peanut marrying a princess!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: blue
Girl to friends: I think my husband’s gonna divorce me now that gay marriage is legal.
–N10th & Bedford Ave, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Non Hipster
Woman in a wedding dress and veil, on cell: Yeah, I got kicked out.
–Penn Station
Little girl, loudly, to security guard: My brother has a suspicious package in his pants!
Mother, pulling her away: You don't talk about that in public!
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Strip search in 3…2…1…
Little boy: Mommy, John McCain likes Abba.
Mom: Does he really now? Then you two have something in common.
Little boy: Noooooo!
–College Walk, Columbia University
Lady approaching friend and her child: Well, hello Sabrina! What are you going to ask from Santa Claus for Christmas?
Little girl: Look, lady — I’m eight, not ignorant.
–Christmas market, Union Square
Overheard by: jaded
Little boy in glasses: Excuse me! Do you have big titties?
20-something blonde: What? You shouldn't say stuff like that!
Hobo: Don't you be talkin to ladies like that! She's old enough to be your mama!
–Prince & Elizabeth
Overheard by: kma
Father: How was school today?
Little girl: Didn’t have school today, it was Saturday.
Father: Oh. What about tomorrow?
Little girl: No, that’s Sunday.
Father: Oh.
Little girl: Are we taking a taxi?
Father: No.
Little girl: Good.
–Queens bound F train
Overheard by: djingo
