Manhattan

Shopping girl: Look, those are pre-viewed! Wait, what does that mean?

–Tower Records, Union Square South

Woman on cell: I’m not a HOOKER! I’m a PROSTITUTE you piece of shit fuck!

–In front of Barnes & Noble, Union Square North

Overheard by: Jenna Carlson

Man: My friend asked me if they were shooting a movie, and I said,
“Yeah, it’s called Bombscare.”

–Astor Place

50-ish woman: My mom had a stroke.
Friend: Honestly, worse things can happen.

–Café Henri, West Village

Girl: I’ve never had venison before.
Guy: Order it. You can taste Bambi. You can taste the innocence. And the fear.

–“A” Restaurant, Columbus Avenue

Young guy on cell: You're lucky I'm Colombian. If I was Ecuadorian, I'd be slapping you!

–Jackson Heights

Overheard by: Jobee

Angry man walking alone, to himself: I could have married a Dominican, but no, I decided not to!

–Mercer & Broome

Teen girl to friend: Your new Mexican is super creepy.

–On Line for the Colbert Report, Hell's Kitchen

Guy on cell: No, no, man, she's Puerto Rican. I'm just sayin' she's Dominican 'cause it sounds hotter.

–105 St & Lexington

Thug holding box of maxi pads: Yo, that motherfucker is like the gay Mexican Marlon Brando. Classic…

–CVS

Overheard by: Karen

Guy: I said to myself ‘he’s never going to make it’, he’s a drug freak, he has three STDs. But you proved me wrong, my friend

–Columbia Journalism School Graduation Reception

Overheard by: Mooching the Free Food

Queer on cell: I had three staph infections last year — one from the gym shower and the other two from the Roxy, but we won’t go into that.

–11th St & 2nd Ave

Surly truck driver: Yeah, the test results came back positive… but I’m not going to tell her.

–W 57th

Overheard by: Greg H.

Woman: Well, it turns out that I was married a second time.
Man: Turns out to be? Like this was a surprise to you?

–Church & Liberty

Hobo: Spare some change for the fucking poor? Yeah, that’s right, you fucking chinks. Fucking slanty-eyed flat-assed bitches! Suck my ass!
Asian woman: He said my butt was flat!

–114th & Broadway

Teen girl #1: I'm done with you. I hate you. I hope DJ Spinbad performs at the sweet 16 you're going to tomorrow!
Teen girl #2: Ohh you take that back. Take it back!

–5th Ave

Chick: Do you have your Halloween costume yet?
Dude: Yeah, I’m gonna be Spam… but not the salty kind!

–Madison Ave

Overheard by: sophia johannah zuckerman pogoff’s friend emi