Scents of the City

Hobo: Hey, ladies. [Girls giggle.] You smell so good — like Campbell’s soup!

–10th & Broadway

Overheard by: Emily

Man on cell: You tell your smelly sisters that they have to shower tonight.

–39th & 5th

Queer hipster to fag hag: Oh my god, his placenta stank!

–N train

Overheard by: Lauren

Chick to friend: Shut up, or I’ll sniff you in a minute!

–Central Park

JAP: Ew, like — I like, washed my hair, like, this morning… Why does it, like, smell? Ewww… That’s sooo bimmey!

–1 train

Chipper thugette: I smell pussy!

–L train, Bedford stop

Boy (shouting): Damn son, smell like train up in here!
Flaming gay guy: You aint smellin' like flowers either, 'kay?

–D Train

Young woman to another: But do you know how big a horse dick is?

–5th Ave & Carroll, Park Slope

Girl: I'm really tired. I'm, like, an animal activist right now.

–Parking Lot, Broadway Mall

Overheard by: Lysa

Student: I'm not that sensitive. I can watch those videos where they like, torture the animal or whatever, and then I'll go eat it.

–Cardozo Law School

Asian girl: Does this make me look like a sad Panda?

–NYU Dining Hall

Columbia girl: I'd never have asked if I knew he was the one who'd killed it. But I didn't suspect him. Who'd spend their time strangling a gerbil?

–Columbia University

Overheard by: Who'd have thought?

Guido to friend: Yo, it smells like a skunk burped up a hot dog.

–Penn Station

Lady on speaker: If you have an animal, please do not put it through the X-ray.

–LaGuardia Airport

Dude #1: Dude! You farted!
Dude #2: Dude! We're outside! What do you want me to do, hold it till we get inside?

–22nd St & 6th Ave

Overheard by: Manhattman

Pretty girl #1 in parking lot of zoo: Yep, it smells like zoo here.
Pretty girl #2: Well, I just farted.
Pretty girl #1, walking a few feet: Nope, still smells like zoo.

–Bronx Zoo

Overheard by: Ashley and Daria

Polish guy: Dude, it smells like a midget's ass over here!
Friend: How do you know what a midget's ass smells like?
Drunk guy: He's Polish! How else would he be able to screw in a lightbulb?

–Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Overheard by: POLA

Child #1, about strong fish smell: Yuck! What’s that smell?
Child #2: I smell freedom!

–Ferry near Statue of Liberty

Overheard by: Tom Jotkowitz

Disgusted girl: It smells like rats!
Guy: No, it's just shit you're smelling.

–St Mark's & Ave A

Overheard by: j

Woman: Send good karma so they’ll hire me to practice law without a license.

–8th Ave.

Lady CO: If y’all don’t shut up and behave, I’m turning off the fan! And y’all stink, remember.

–Hoyt-Schermerhorn Jail and Courthouse

Overheard by: Carolina

Mother: The other day I walked past a bunch of Hispanic teenagers. They smelled really good.
Teen boy: It’s Axe.
Mother: What?
Teen boy: Axe.
Mother: Wait, what?
Teen boy: Axe!
Mother: Ass? That’s not nice to say about Hispanic people.

–SoHo

Overheard by: Kevo C.