Guy #1: The reason people don’t read enough is because there’s too many other forms of media that are more interesting. Why is some kid gonna pick up a book when he can watch one of the thousands channels on TV? That’s it! There needs to be a channel about books!
Guy #2: There is a channel about books. It’s called Book TV. It’s boring as hell.
Guy #1: Oh.
–Near Baruch College, 23rd St
Guy: Wait, what part of New York is Chicago in?
Girl: What?! Chicago isn’t in New York! Chicago is its own state.
Guy: No, it’s not a state! It’s called the “windy city.”
Girl: Oh, right. I guess it is in New York then.
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Hang on, I’ll look it up on my blackberry.
–Fordham University
Tourist girl #1: You know that movie Juno? Is it named after “Ju-no”, like, “You know?”…”Ju-no”?
Tourist girl #2: I think it’s her name.
Tourist girl #1: Oh… Ok.
–6 Train
Overheard by: Emily
Customer: Can I get an eggplant and mozzarella sandwich?
Employee: We outta eggs.
Customer: No, not eggs… Eggplant.
Employee: We outta eggs.
Customer: But eggplant and eggs are two entirely different things…
Employee, winking: The customer is always right.
–Au Bon Pain, Greenwich Village
Overheard by: Caelster
Brooklyn family court employee: What’s your daughter’s name?
Mother: Chicago.
Brooklyn family court employee: Like the state?
Mother: Yes.
–Brooklyn Family Court
Guy: That’s the house George Washington grew up in.
Girl: Wait, really?
Guy: No, you dumb bitch. Why did I ever marry you?
–70th Ave, Forest Hills, Queens
Overheard by: emma
Young guy: Hey, what do you think about interracial marriage?
Young girl: What, you mean like gay people?
Guy: [Stares at her blankly.] … What?
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Raymond Saada
Tourist: Can you tell me where grand zero is?
Lady: You mean ground zero?
Tourist: Yes, I guess it is the same thing, okay…
Lady pointing straight ahead: Walk straight ahead. You see the big gap in the sky? There you go.
Tourist: Wait. I don’t see anything. What, its all gone already?
Lady: Are you retarded?
–Corner of Church & Reade
College meathead #1: You don’t think generally the size of the person is the size of the dick?
College meathead #2: Nah, I mean how could you prove that?
College meathead #3: Dude, why do you think babies’ dicks are so small?
–Fordham University
Overheard by: sromeo
English teacher: So, have you ever gone with your class to The Met?
Bimbette art student: I don’t do things.
–Pratt Institute
Overheard by: traPt (ashamed to be an art student)
