Yuppie: Today was such an incredible day, I met Richard Branson, and…
Hipster: Who?
Yuppie: Oh, Fabian, that’s why I love you so much.
–Broadway & 28th
Yuppie: Today was such an incredible day, I met Richard Branson, and…
Hipster: Who?
Yuppie: Oh, Fabian, that’s why I love you so much.
–Broadway & 28th
Informed yuppie: …yeah, no city money was wasted, it was all self financed.
–The Gates
Grandpa: You’re not listening to me!
Grandma: Well, if I listened to you what would you ever have to yell about?
–The Gates
Overheard by: Martha Gelnaw
Little boy: Where are the rides? Mommy, I want to go on the rides!
–The Gates
Yuppie guy: So, what did you have for breakfast?
Yuppie girl: Um, a chicken and cheese sandwich.
Yuppie guy: You mean an egg and cheese?
Yuppie girl: Oh, yeah. Well, technically it’s still a chicken sandwich. What came first, anyway, the chicken or the egg?
Yuppie guy: Well, probably the chicken because it was created — like Adam and Eve.
Yuppie girl: Personally, I think it was the egg. I believe in evolution.
Yuppie guy: Uh-huh.
–Starbucks, E 53rd
Overheard by: Johanna
Flyer guy to tourist: Take it, take it, it’s free! But my weed is not. I’ll be right here until five.
–45th & Broadway
Overheard by: Engi
Yuppie guy: Hey, you wanna buy a bong and get pierced?
–MacDougal & Bleecker
Overheard by: Betty Noir
Guy listening to iPod: Pussy, money, weed! Pussy, money, weed! Pussy, money, weed!
–183rd & Audubon Ave
Overheard by: BB
Black guy to another: All those niggas do is smoke weed and call ACS on each other!
–A train, Brooklyn
Guy on cell: Dude every time she sees me she’s like, ‘O-M-G, you’re high.’ And I usually am, but like, I like to think I hide it well. But she always knows. And even so, I’m like, ‘Em, why do you have to comment on it every single time? At the dorms, at parties, even at Target one time!’ Hahaha… But anyway, we might come Thursday. I’ll see if my funds are in order to make the trip. What kind of shit would we have to wear? Beach stuff? Oooh, and I could rock my stunna shades.
–6 train
Guy outside MTV studios: Stay calm. Everything is going to be okay. There will be marijuana giveaways.
–1515 Broadway
Overheard by: Rebecca
Guy: We are such yuppies.
Girl: What’s a yuppie?
Guy: It stands for Young Urban Professional.
Girl: Oh, I thought it just meant anyone who lives in New York who’s under the age of 25.
–Angelika, Houston Street
Yuppie giving panhandler change: Don't do drugs.
Panhandler: Where am I going to buy drugs for a quarter?
–105th St & Broadway
Overheard by: matthew
Overprivileged yuppie #1: Did you see that? Dude, did you *see* that?! Man, I *own* this fucking city!
Overprivileged yuppie #2: No you don't, skizzball. Donald Trump owns this fucking city.
Overprivileged yuppie #1: Donald Trump can suck my dick!
–85th & 2nd
Overheard by: SoOverIt
Yuppie chick #1: Sarah D. Roosevelt Park! Remember when we bought crack there?
Yuppie chick #2: We didn’t even buy crack. We just smoked it.
–Houston & Chrystie
Yuppie #1: Somebody had better shut that kid up.
Yuppie #2: Someone should tell that woman to control her child.
Yuppie #3, across train: Would somebody please tell that woman to shake her baby?!
–Very crowded R train
Overheard by: The3rdBridge
Yuppie on cell (trying to be discreet): Hey mom. Are you busy? Could you Google Maps me? I'm on Houston and West Broadway. Yeah, I didn't want to ask anyone for directions and make a fool of myself. Although I'm pretty sure I just did, because half of this coffee shop is looking at me now.
–W Houston
Overheard by: Let's face it, we were all new at one point.
40-something yuppie woman: And then I realized that my biggest problem in life is that most of the time I'm incredibly happy, but I'm not aware of how happy I am.
–81st & Madison
Yuppie dad to seven-year-old daughter: Now when you start buying iPods, that's when you're going to want to have a Visa card.
–Stanton & Christie
Overheard by: Ross
Three-year-old yuppie spawn: Noooooooooooo! I don't want Pad Thai! I want sushi!
–Dice Thai, Prospect Park
Overheard by: I'll take sushi too but you're payin', kid
