Hipster Girl: Hipsterism was made for Jewish guys and Asian Girls.
— Williamsburg
Hipster Girl: Hipsterism was made for Jewish guys and Asian Girls.
— Williamsburg
Asian Kid: The fucking Triads are on your tail, bitch. Run!
Hispanic Kid: Fuck that! The Latin Kings will pump lead into your asses.
Black Kid: Nah, the Bloods and Crips will beat you down.
Jewish Kid: Yo…Um…I’ll get my yarmulke peoples to smack you all, son. What now nigga spic chink bitch ho? Suck my matzoh balls, bitch!
–Canal Street
Overheard by: Jonathan Harris
Asian yuppie: Now I don’t have to be possessive anymore. Instead, I rely on Jesus.
–Grand Cafe, Williamsburg
A black girl tries to squeeze past twin asian chicks and a little asian boy to get into the train.
Black girl: Do you mind?
Asian chick #1: Don’t be rude, can’t you go around us?
Black girl: I don’t move around people; they move around me.
Asian chick #1: You’re inside now, so please stop yelling at us.
Black girl: You are so rude! Is that how you talk to people in front of your child?
Asian chick #1: You know, I’m tired of listening to your crap. Talk to the hand.
Asian boy: Yeah, you talk too much. Talk to the hand!
–A train
Short Asian man to tall black man: You play basketball?
Tall black man: You fix computers?
–Starbucks
Petite Asian woman on cell: And that's when I'll cut off his penis!
–East Village
Overheard by: Katie
Guy in the middle of group photo: Okay, now everybody take your cocks out.
–The Luxor Hotel, Columbus & 81st St
Loud matronly woman on cell, exasperated: Whose penis was on your thing?
–3rd & 16th
Overheard by: Joe & Eliz
Young lesbian on cell: She kept yelling "penis!" the whole time we were doing it… Should I call her?
–Long Island City
Overheard by: Sunny
Asian kid #1: If I get any lazier, I just might die.
Asian kid #2: Sometimes I'm too lazy to sleep.
Asian kid #3: How many calories does it take to sleep?
Asian kid #1: Ask your brain.
Asian kid #2: Ask google.
–Lafayette & Walker
Overheard by: Jesse G.
Really hot, butch Asian gay guy: It really just depends on the guy… I mean, I suppose versatility interests me. (looks away suspiciously, downs drink)
Really hot, butch white gay guy: Definitely. Versatility is key. I mean, I don't think I could ever date a total top. You're not a total top, are you?
Really hot, butch Asian gay guy: Not anymore.
–Bar, 51st & 9th
Little Asian boy, reading sign: “Asian mammals”
Asian boy's father: That's you, Audrey!
–American Museum of Natural History
Subway philosopher: What's that?
Asian girl with Nintendo: A game.
Subway philosopher: A game? Ha! You want to hear the biggest game of all? Marriage. You heard of Grand Theft Auto? Grand Theft Marriage–you get a car and a house.
–Uptown F Train
Overheard by: Isabella
