Beauty

Guy #1: Hey, that girl’s pretty cute.
Guy #2: Yeah, except the hat is kind of Inspector Gadget.
Guy #1: Yeah, or Peter Sellers. She’s got kind of a Peter Sellers look going on.
Guy #2: “I love the way you look like Peter Sellers… but hot.”

–6 Train

Law student to little girl with pink balloon dog: I really like your balloon! It's so pretty!
Girl's dad: What do you say?
Little girl: Woof woof!

–79th & 2nd

20-ish girl: Dammit, why aren’t you coming to my party?
20-ish guy: I told you — I have to go to DC that night with my family.
20-ish girl: How am I going to show off my terribly attractive boyfriend to all my other less-attractive boyfriends if you’re not going to be there?!

–L train

Trendy teen girl #1: You know, it’s like a fat girl who has a really pretty face…
Trendy teen girl #2: Oh my god, I hate that!

–Tribeca

One of three Abercrombie zombies: So, which of us do you think is the prettiest?
Cute Czech immigrant: You all look the same.

–L train

Overheard by: spazzoid

Deli man: You have beautiful eyes.
Woman: Thank you.
Deli man: You better take care of them.

–63rd & 1st

Maternal woman to 14-year-old girl: My, aren't you looking sexy!
Random creepy guy: She ain't wrong!

–Bayview Place, Staten Island

Overheard by: now I want a mental shower

Suit #1: There was some great tail at that funeral.
Suit #2: Oh yeah!

–28th & 5th

Overheard by: brp

Customer: Hey, you lost a lot of weight.
Barista: No, I gave birth two weeks ago.
Customer: To a baby?

–Starbucks

Overheard by: mjw51

Man #1, sounding exasperated: Some women are so beautiful that I can't–I just can't even look at them.
Man #2: I know. Beauty hurts.

–14th St & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Evan