Black person #1: Did you see Obama's speech last night?
Black person #2: No, what did he say?
Black person #1: Someone asked if he knows how much debt he is putting us in, and he says “Listen, I'm not the motherfucker that got us here.”
(they high five)
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Annoying college girl #1: Your boyfriend is so sweet!
Annoying college girl #2: I know. Did I tell you what he did? He sent me an e-mail with teddy bears in hearts with flowers all around.
Annoying college girl #1: Awww.
Annoying college girl #2: Yeah. I told him he was gay.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: serena
Dad: You are being very annoying right now, you know that?
10-year-old girl: Well, it's a good thing mom didn't have twins, huh?
–World of Disney Store
Overheard by: CollegiateCutie
Tall girl: So what happened?
Brunette with bangs: I just didn't respond. I figured that'd drive him crazier. Besides, what do I have to say, really? “You sucked in bed and were too emo for me–grow a pair and learn to fuck”? That's not very nice, and frankly, the whole thing was so weird and casual I was glad it ended quietly.
–Enid's, Greenpoint
Unstylish woman to woman in fur coat: Fur is murder!
Woman in coat: You should be murdered.
–6th Ave & 9th St
Overheard by: ilove fur
Front row student: Well, I am certain that my mom will always be there when I need her.
Professor: You mean she will always be there (pause) until she dies, which we are all certain of.
–Lecutre, NYU
Band member #1: I'm feeling a little like Calvin and Hobbes with this cardboard time machine here.
Band member #2: I don't know what you're talking about.
–Ars Nova, W 54th St
Overheard by: Emily B.
Young woman: Do you need help crossing the street?
Elderly woman: No. It's fucking red.
–96th & Broadway
Overheard by: Meghan
Suit to man with cat on his head: Why is there a cat on your head?
Man with cat on his head: Why isn't there a cat on your head, douchebag?
–Union Square
Ghetto lady to another: Her son is a lesbian!
–Port Authority Bus Station
Suit to friend: Did I ever tell you about the time I ran into a Dunkin Donuts Drive Thru window with a transvestite in my back seat?
–N Train
Overheard by: Tater
Cop: The trannies hate the DVDs. They just can't get along. They hate each other more than the Bloods and the Crips!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Jon A.
Girl on cell: He just turned around and slipped into the skirt, and I just had to tell him! (pause) No, it didn't flatter his figure.
–Avery Fisher Hall, Lincoln Center
Crazy guy, pointing to girl sitting on fireplug: She's a man! That girl's a man! She's a man! Heh, heh…okay, stay there, I'll be right back. (pause) To punch you in the face!
–23rd & 7th
Overheard by: EthanK
Guy on phone: First you wanted to be a car salesman, and now you want to be drag queen?
–31st b/w 9th &10th
Overheard by: roommate of guy on phone
