Med student: I wish you were straight, so I could have sex with you right now.
Flamboyant friend, sighing: I'm not in the mood.
–Columbia University
Med student: I wish you were straight, so I could have sex with you right now.
Flamboyant friend, sighing: I'm not in the mood.
–Columbia University
Concerned girl crossing street: But the light says “Don't walk”!
Amused friend: Right…so we run!
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: I was sauntering, personally
Girl #1: I seriously love Barry Manilow. I’m gonna get Barry Manilow to perform at my wedding.
Girl #2: No, he’s gonna be dead by then.
–157th & Broadway
Friend #1: It smells like green beans on this train!
Friend #2: Your mom smells like green beans.
Friend #1: (pauses) I know.
–F Train
Chick #1: … And then he just shoved his whole fist in! I mean, he didn’t even place it in. I guess he was, like, really drunk or something, but I mean, still — and everyone at the table was like, ‘Awkward…’
Chick #2: So awkward!
–41 Eastern Pkwy, Brooklyn
Girl #1: Poor Anthony needs to get laid.
Girl #2: I’d lay him if he promised not to be emo about it.
–Times Square
Guy: Dude! It’s the guy who took over Factsheet 5!
Girl: Who?
Guy: Factsheet 5! It was a zine about zines.
Girl: Who?
Guy: Stop saying “who”! Factsheet 5 is not a person!
Girl: What?
–Park Slope
Indie kid #1: The Sidewalk Cafe is going to be, like, Mecca.
Indie kid #2: When the Anti-Folk Revolution occurs?
Indie kid #1: Yeah!
–Ave. A & 6th St.
Guy #1: I took the day off. I’m going up to Long Island City to see the doctor.
Guy #2: Oh yeah? What’s the matter?
Guy #1: I have to get this boil looked at.
Guy #2: Sorry to hear that.
Guy #1: Yeah, well…normally it’s not a problem. I just pop it and it all goes away, but this one, man, I’ve popped it three times and it’s still big and painful as hell. Normally I don’t complain about these things, but man, this one is right below my balls…and it’s killing me! They tell me it’s a hair growing the wrong way. How does a hair do that?
–A train
Kid #1, to kid #2 on bike: Come on, let me ride on the pegs.
Kid #2: No.
Kid #1: Fine, I’ll ride you.
–129th St, Rockaway
Overheard by: Robert
