Girl: Your breath is stinky.
Guy: Please. My breath is so fresh they should name a mint after it.
Girl: How about excre-mint?
–56th & 1st
Girl: Your breath is stinky.
Guy: Please. My breath is so fresh they should name a mint after it.
Girl: How about excre-mint?
–56th & 1st
Unkempt facial hair guy: What kinds of clubs are you going to these days?
Bald guy with glasses: Oh, you know, ones where they wear body glitter and talk bullshit.
–3rd Avenue & 9th Street
Overheard by: Nico Westerdale
Guy: I have to be careful about my bag; yesterday I put it down and then stepped to the side and some woman started yelling at me, saying, “You know, it’s 2005 now, I have no problem taking that bag and throwing it off the train.” And I was like, “I’m sorry you feel that way,” and she said, “I’m not, I’m protecting myself and the rest of the passengers.”
Woman: The terror alert has been elevated to Birkin.
–Times Square shuttle
Guy: Jonny sent me on an errand. I feel like a mule. I’m like a donkey to him!
—NY2LON show, Bowery Ballroom
Guy #1: Hey, check out the headline in the Daily News: Free Viagra for Pervs.
Guy #2: Woo-hoo! When do I get mine?
–Washington Square Park
Guy #1: So what happened with you and Liz?
Guy #2: We broke up last week.
Guy #1: For good this time?
Guy #2: Yeah, well, I told her to go get fucked, and apparently that’s just what she did.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Ted Stickels
Guy: That’s crazy, man. That’s worse than crazy, that’s fucking psychotic! Seventy dollars for a fucking permit. Seventy, eighty dollars for a moving violation, that I understand. But seventy dollars for a fucking permit? The fucking well is running dry!
–Prospect Avenue station
Overheard by: Alison
Teen girl: Let’s order together but have them put it in separate bags. We’ll pay less tax that way.
–Wendy’s, Union Square
Overheard by: Nathan Kipe
Tourist:…no, really! The streets are so clean!
–24th & Broadway
Overheard by: Manhattman
Girl: Is that soup place the Soup Nazi? Did he go out of business?
Guy: Yeah, ever since Soup V.E. Day…
–55th & 8th
Overheard by: Lindsay Robertson
Guy: I think Ground Zero is kind of interesting. There’s nothing there, but it’s kind of cool. Also, if you walk along 5th Avenue there’s a lot of cool stores.
–V train
Fat lady: Well, this was worth the cab ride, I guess.
–Ground Zero
Overheard by: Eileen Donnelly
Foreign tourist: Excuse me, where is the World Trade Center?
Woman: Um, they’re gone.
–Church & Warren
Overheard by: Clay Caviness
Chick: Do you trust me with your CDs? I’ll try not to scratch them or anything.
Dude: I trust you with my balls. I think I’m OK with you touching my CDs.
–111th & Broadway
Overheard by: Djlindee
