Big Guido: Yeah, and now he's going to recycle his urine!
Small squirmy dude: Woah, cool! He's gonna make a ton of money.
–9th Ave & 45th
Big Guido: Yeah, and now he's going to recycle his urine!
Small squirmy dude: Woah, cool! He's gonna make a ton of money.
–9th Ave & 45th
Guy #1: You squattin?
Guy #2: Nah, just listening to Michael Jackson.
–Harlem New York Sports Club
Overheard by: Obvious Misunderstanding
Guy #1: It's too bad, 'cuz the good child actors always grow up to be terrible adult actors.
Girl #1: Not always. You have people like Drew Barrymore…
Girl #2: Or Doogie Howser.
Guy #2: Neil Patrick Harris! He has a name!
–St. John the Divine Cathedral
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Teenage boy, explaining why he joined the Air Force: We've been around since World War II. We fought against the Germans and sank several submarines. We also killed a whale, but that's not the point.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
20-something dude to friend: Ma-fucking-rines! The Marines! Man, I'ma join up, be a Marine, and go all over the world, fuck, and have babies. I'ma get laid and have a baby in every country: Spain, France… even Pakistan!
–50th & 8th
Overheard by: camillia*
Little boy in army fatigues hiding behind fallen tree: Pow! Pow! Look, mommy! It's the Battle of the Bulge!
–St. Mark's
Lady with Russian accent to salesperson in outerwear section: I don't like the style, it's not feminine. It's like for soldiers, or Chinese people.
–Lord & Taylor, 39th St
Overheard by: mira
Off-duty MTA worker to another: Britain? Whatever man, we beat they ass with… muskets and shit!
–6 Train
Young, attractive blonde: See, if we didn't get a divorce, you totally would have cheated on me.
Old, unattractive dude: Yeah, yeah. You're right.
–Home Depot
Guy: Nathan's the only one that's never lied to me.
Ditzy girl: Oh, yeah? What about me? I've never lied to you!
Guy: You did lie to me. That one time you told me you had Aids/cancer. I looked that up. It doesn't exist!
–Bobst Library, NYU
Overheard by: Krys
Guy #1: And then I said, “bitch, I speak crazy too!”
Guy #2: Damn right!
–42nd St
Overheard by: Doesn't speak crazy
White guy in suit to drunk Asian girl coming out of the subway: Will you come home with me?
Please?
Asian girl: What? Why?
White guy: I'm lonely and I want to sleep together.
Asian girl: I'm not a prostitute, you dick!
–Time Square
Guy: Yeah, I'm reading that in the Playbill.
Bimbo: Ew! You brought a porno magazine to a Broadway show?
Guy: No, no, no… Playbill. Not Playboy. It's a Broadway magazine.
Bimbo: Oh. (pauses) So wait, it's gay porno?
–8th Ave
Flyer guy, handing card to guy #1: Hey man! Come see these hot chicks!
(guy #1 looks at it and hands it off to guy #2 behind him, then guy #2 behind him hands it of to girl behind him)
Guy #1: Dude, did you just give that card to that girl?
Guy #2: Yeah, why?
Guy #1: Awesome.
–42nd St
Overheard by: Kevin
