Dude: You may think you’ve never even met anyone like him, but in reality you’ve never even heard of anyone like him.
Intrigued girl: Uh-huh… Totally.
–Bedford ave, Williamsburg
Dude: You may think you’ve never even met anyone like him, but in reality you’ve never even heard of anyone like him.
Intrigued girl: Uh-huh… Totally.
–Bedford ave, Williamsburg
Lady #1: Canadia is a continent!
Lady #2: No, Canadia is definitely a state.
–Subway
Overheard by: Cathi
Man dressed as a werewolf: You look like you have some Native American heritage, maybe Mohawk.
Chinese man: I'm Chinese.
Man dressed as a werewolf: Well, Chinese is pretty much the same as Native American, they have the same spirit.
Chinese man: Sort of.
–The Slaughtered Lamb
Ditz #1: So yeah, I think Jesus was totally a mongoose soul.
Ditz #2: Totally. And Harry Potter, too.
(they nod together)
–F Train
Overheard by: Numbat
Hoochie #1: I’m okay with abortions and everything, but I think if I had to get them every other month that’d be nasty.
Hoochie #2: Uh-huh.
–LIRR, Huntington Branch
Overheard by: Mark Schilsky
Woman in self-scan lane, yelling at employee: These Peeps won’t scan!
Employee: Ma’am, please calm down. I can scan them in for you.
Woman: No, you know what? I don’t need the Peeps. I’ll take my Pepsi and forget the Peeps. Peeps not scanning… Ugh!
Employee, under her breath: Every fucking time this bitch is in here…
–Food Emporium
Overheard by: Meaghan
White girl #1: Dude, I just knocked off work.
White girl #2: Where you working?
White girl #1: The florist.
White girl #2: Dude, that’s pretty gangster.
–Central Park
Woman: I’ve never seen so many cars out there.
Cashier: The Jewish people are praying.
Woman: Really?
Cashier: Yeah, I think tomorrow is the start of Ramadan.
–Wendy’s, Bensonhurst
Tourist #1: We should visit Chinatown.
Tourist #2: Why?
Tourist #1: We can see real Chinese people in their natural habitat.
–Subway station, West 4th St
Guy #1: The Great Cock Hunt? Isn’t that a Hunter S. Thompson novel?
Guy #2: No, you idiot. It’s a gay porn site. What kind of mo are you?
–Starbucks, 23rd & 8th
