Girl: So I saw JT last night.
Friend: The guy with the ear-wax fetish?!
–Times Square
Overheard by: lilah
Girl: So I saw JT last night.
Friend: The guy with the ear-wax fetish?!
–Times Square
Overheard by: lilah
Punk rocker to ghetto chick: Say…you ever been fucked by a smelly guy in a banana suit?
–J Train
Overheard by: Markthrone
Loud, laughing redhead on cell: Ha ha! I'll plant another pear tree, and that will be Tricia!
–W 57th St
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Brosef to girls (oddly aggressively): Which do you like more, bananas or oranges? Say it!
–14th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Rooting for bananas
Guy on cell: Did you order the poster of the banana?
–Central Park
Overheard by: urbanadventurer
Overachiever mom to 5-year-old girl: No, I'm not saying that you have to have a piece of fruit. I'm saying that when we get there, you'll get to choose. It'll be your choice. You can choose fruit or you can choose a granola bar. (pause) Of course, fruit is the healthier choice.
–7th Ave & 26th St
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Heavily tattooed man: So we started playing this game. We shoved grapes up her ass, and she had to drop them in a martini glass.
–St. Mark's Place
Overheard by: Housey
Chick: Her Facebook picture is her double-fisting two beer bottles.
Queer: Oh, please. You know they were originally two cocks and she Photoshopped them out.
–House party, 172 & Broadway
Overheard by: Well-dressed Indian boy
Latina: I don't care what a guy says, I'm not gonna let him piss on me.
–Vesey Street & Broadway
Overheard by: Sam
Giggling four-year-old boy: Yeah, and there was a sign and it said, "Caution: someone peed here!"
–Waverly & W 11th
Bimbo: And he was like, "Sarah, you pissed the bed" and I was like, "Whaaaaat?" and he was like, "Sarah, get up, you pissed the fucking bed!"
–Theater District
Overheard by: Paul
Girl on cell: Alright, fine, but if you pee on me again, we're done!
–C Train
Overheard by: Laura
Guy, in disbelief: You mean you've never been pissed on before?!
–14th & Broadway
Overheard by: Josh
Girl: Would it be considered indecent exposure if I peed in the sink?
–Lyceum Theatre
Girl to friend: Her?! She totally splashes her urine.
–34th & 8th
Overheard by: Ellen
Bald construction guy: Dude, if you fell down while she was going down on you, I probably would have peed all over her. (swinging motion with hand at crotch area) Oooohhhh.
Suit: Oh my god, if you did that I would have started peeing on her too.
–Pizza Wagon, 86th Street
Overheard by: Trying to Enjoy my Lunch over here
College student #1: Yeah, I pissed on her, but she was old.
College student #2: It doesn’t matter! You fuckin’ pissed on a girl!
College student #1: But she was old!
College student #2: Old… young… It doesn’t matter! You pissed on a bitch!
–Canal St & Church St
Overheard by: Kenny Gay
Guy: Please do not tell me you took a shit in this cup.
Girl: We can wash it out.
–74th & Columbus
Guy in elevator: God, it’s hot! Must be my underwear…
Chick: Underwear, yeah?
Guy in elevator: Yeah, I got plastic underwear… [Chick is silent.] … For easy cleaning.
–28th & 6th
Thugette: I just want to go some place where I feel comfortable.
Thug: I just want to go some place where I can piss on you.
–East Village
Overheard by: r. kelly
