Man: I need the number for an ear doctor.
Woman: An ENT?
Man: Yeah, an ENT.
Woman: Why? What happened?
Man: In '86, I got hit in the head with brass knuckles.
–6 Train
Man: I need the number for an ear doctor.
Woman: An ENT?
Man: Yeah, an ENT.
Woman: Why? What happened?
Man: In '86, I got hit in the head with brass knuckles.
–6 Train
Jewish girl #1: I got an ultrasound last week.
Jewish girl #2: I had an ultrasound once. I got to see my ovaries.
Jewish girl #1: How did they look?
Jewish girl #2: Really cute!
–F Train
Overheard by: forgotmyipod
Mother to noisy, restless son: You know what? As soon as we get home I’m calling your doctor. You’re going back on medication.
Kid, screaming: Nooo! [Spotting boarding passenger] Oh, he has a wrestling shirt! I want a wresting shirt!
–M101 bus
Overheard by: Glad it’s not my kid
Queer #1: I need to lose some weight for the summer.
Queer #2: When I was in the hospital I lost 10 pounds in three days. What you need is a good trauma to get you started.
–Houston & Sullivan
Overheard by: endo
Guy on cell: Seriously [Bryan] the shit won’t go away! The fucking rash is still there….yes, I put that cream on my dick but shit, it’s still there!…Oh, I have to put the cream on more than once? You never mentioned that.
Woman: Sweetie, everyone knows you have to put cream on more than once, no matter where you put it.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Ali
Doctor: You know, people pay more for a Starbucks coffee than they do to visit me for a copay. That's what important in this world.
Colleague: Maybe you should put an espresso machine in your office.
–Starbucks, 96th St & Madison Ave
Girl #1: Being doped up on allergy medication probably isn’t the best time to confront an ex, right?
Girl #2: Right, definitely not.
Girl #1: And I probably only want to because I’m too stupid to think otherwise. I really love being able to breathe, but I wish it wasn’t at the price of my brain.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Rachael Swiss
Doctor guy: Okay, we have the chest x-ray and it explains what’s going on. See this lesion? It is pretty impressive.
Patient lady: “Impresssive”? Is that a medical term? Am I gonna have to google that, too?
–Office, 71st & Park
Overheard by: Next exam room
Girl on cell: Yeah, so after I get the surgery, I’m not going to be able to drink or eat for, like, three months.
Friend, on speakerphone: Oh, man, that’s rough. Is there, like, a special diet you go on for that?
Girl on cell: I don’t know — I should look online. I’m sure plenty of people have done it before.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Katrina
(friend #1 looks into friend #2's Duane Reade bag)
Friend #1: Athlete foot's medicine?
Friend #2: Yeah, it's summer.
Friend #1: No! Just pee on your feet in the shower. I learned that from Madonna!
–Duane Reade, Chelsea
Overheard by: Wil Reyes
