Child: Mommy, why do we have to take off our shoes?
Mom: Because that’s the kind of irrational world we live in, where little children have to take off their shoes.
–Security line, LaGuardia Airport
Overheard by: jenya
Child: Mommy, why do we have to take off our shoes?
Mom: Because that’s the kind of irrational world we live in, where little children have to take off their shoes.
–Security line, LaGuardia Airport
Overheard by: jenya
Little kid with notebook: Mom, what is this called?
Mom: That's a notebook.
Little kid: Notebook! Notebook! I got a notebook! My Facebook! Facebook!
Mom, amused: How do you know about Facebook?
–Downtown 1 Train
Overheard by: Camillia*
Voice over PA, as train is pulling out of the station: How you gonna let your child run around like that? You call yourself a mother? I could’ve closed the doors on your child and then what? You would’ve been all sad and shit but I was nice, I chose to keep the doors open. You call yourself a mother… lettin’ your child run around on the subway…
–1 train
Overheard by: LSB
Little girl in stroller, pointing to fossil in subway wall: Look! A skeleton fish!
Mother: And what's another name for a skeleton fish? (pause) A dinosaur!
–C Train
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Guy selling belts: Getcha belts here! Five dollahs! Belts! Only FIVE DOLLAHS!
Touristy man passes by with 10-year-old son.
Guy selling belts: Getcha belts to hitcha kids with! Talking to them don’t work!
–W 65th St
Flustered woman, about her brood: Have we lost anyone yet?
Husband: Ummm… No.
Flustered woman: Well, who are we going to lose first? Because we haven’t lost anyone yet.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Josh
Headline by: Aeirlys
Runners-Up:
· “Because Abortion THIS Late in the Term Is Just Tacky” – Hillary Claire
· “Hobos Aren’t Born. They’re Made.” – Krisztina
· “It Looked So Much Easier in Home Alone” – You Don’t Want To Know
· “Things Were Shaky Until Fraulein Maria Came Along” – allison
· “Two Roads Diverged in the Woods – I Chose the One My Children Couldn’t Travel” – Drewp
Flight attendant: In case of an emergency, please place the oxygen mask on yourself first. You may then help your favorite child or the one with the most potential.
Well dressed father: Which one would that be?
Bored mother: Neither.
–JFK
Overheard by: Glad my kids weren't with me
Little girl, in very loud voice: Mommy, how old are you?
Older woman: Twenty-two.
Little girl: No, you're not! You're like fifty something!
–JFK
Indian girl to boyfriend: Can you believe she did that? I was just like “what the fuck?”
Boyfriend, obviously not paying attention: Mhhmm. You're right.
Indian girl, angrily: Stop thinking about my mother's breasts!
–Kimmel Student Centre, NYU
Overheard by: I know I would
Smiley man: How you feelin'? How you feelin'?
Little girl: Who's that?
Mom: That was just a nice man sitting on the sidewalk saying hello.
Little girl: Really?
Mom: Yeah, he was talking to you.
–14th St & University Place
Overheard by: Alexandra
