Guy: I am really excited about our trip to Germany in the summer. We have to make sure to stop in Frankfurt to meet my family.
Girl: I am kind of nervous about meeting your grandfather since your mom said he was a Nazi and I am Jewish.
Guy: My grandfather is just a mild Nazi. He only believes in the conspiracy theories about Jews.
Girl: Well, I don’t care that your grandfather’s a Nazi. I love you.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Cannelle
British girl: So, why are you here?
White British guy with headband, wearing an afghan: To spread joy throughout the world.
British girl: …ah.
–E 15th St
Overheard by: Someone who certainly felt joy after overhearing this
Large female southern tourist: It'd be really funny if we got stuck on the toilet and couldn't get up. It'd be the whole "help! Get me off this toilet!" thing.
–Bathroom, Metropolitan Museum of Art
Tourist woman to husband: Where's that cop who was here a minute ago? He gave me the wrong directions, and I wanna cuss him out for it!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Deeds
Tourist: Is this the building where people go all crazy about the numbers?
–Outside New York Stock Exchange
Overheard by: Kyle
50-something tourist husband to wife, while they share bites of same apple: I don't know why we came to this city… We can't even afford breakfast.
–34th & 7th
Chick: I love the L train. On the Q they always wake you up at the end of the line.
Man: Oh, I know! The L train changed my life!
–14th & Broadway
Overheard by: michael nesline
JAP: I can't believe all these people would come to New York to hang out in a mall.
Guy: We're here.
JAP: At least we only came from downtown.
–Bouchon Bakery, Time Warner Center
Overheard by: jj
Guy on cell: …I’m fine, really. It was not a good time to come to London, though. The police are all running around looking worried. I should be back in New York in a few days.
–Duane Reade, Broadway & 84th
Overheard by: kenny
Businessguy: …and then she said, “Let’s meet up in Barcelona next weekend.” Like that’s close!
Businesswoman: You have bonus miles though, don’t you? Plus, you need a vacation anyway, so why not?
Businessman: I’d rather have her come visit me on American soil, like we could go to Montreal for the Grand Prix maybe…
–70th & Lex
Teen girl: You know, relationships are a lot like the British government. The queen thinks she’s in charge, but the prime minister has all the power.
Teen boy: I wonder if people in the real world are subjected to this kind of conversation.
–Stuyvesant High School, Chambers Street
Woman with nasal voice: I just really need to get out of here, I'd prefer to go someplace warm and interesting. But I don't know where it's warm and interesting.
Yuppie man: My boss–well, I guess I should say “my partner,” cause I made partner…but it sounds so (sexual voice) homosexual to say “my partner randy”…anyway, he just came back from Argentina and he loved it.
Woman with nasal voice: Oh! I just went to Argentina, actually. And then to Uruguay. We went to this little town, it was pretty much the Hamptons of South America.
–Barnes & Nobles, E 86th St
Girl #1: I don’t know what I’m going to do next year. I really want to study abroad.
Girl #2: Yeah, I’m going to this gallery in Queens next week.
–NYU elevator
Overheard by: Alex Pareene
