Compare/Contrast

A teen girl punches her father repeatedly in the arm.

Older sister: You know he can’t feel that, right? He’s wearing a leather jacket.
Teen girl: What?
Older sister: Yeah, that’s why motorcyclists wear leather, so they don’t get their skin scraped off when they go sliding across the pavement.
Teen girl: Oh! So if I punch a cow, it can’t feel it?

–The Plaza

Woman #1: She got a booty do
Woman #2: A booty do?
Woman #1: Yeah, you know, when your belly stick out more than your booty do?

–4 train

Girl: [chuckling] You know what’s funny? We always manage to notice how much other people stink but we could never gauge how bad we smell.
Guy: Heh. That’s so true!… Wait, you said that just to tell me how bad I smell.
Girl: Yeah.

–94th & Park

Overheard by: hunter 05

Woman #1: And I told him, I mean, you wanna gamble, you got to go to Las Vegas or Atlantic City. You out there gamblin in Brooklyn where they don’t give you part credit if you part right.
Woman #2: Mmm hmmm.
Woman #1: They lost 10,000 in one day. If you in Las Vegas, at least it’s still a trip. Go outside and get on the roller coaster. Get some buffet. But if you in Brooklyn, you still in Brooklyn when you done gamblin.

–4/5 train

Girl: I don’t look like an Eskimo, I have a tan.
Guy: I thought Eskimos were darker skinned.
Girl: [silence] Guy: I thought Eskimos were darker. I think their skin is darker.
Girl: [silence] Guy: I think they have darker skin.
Girl: [silence] Guy: Anyway I think it’d be funny to see you in an igloo.

–2/3 train

Chick: My drama teacher said that she looked like she had been fed with a shovel as a child…He was my favorite teacher.

–1 train

Overheard by: Sidra Greene

Girl: Do you smell that? Smells like straight up pussy in this bitch.
Guy: I wouldn’t know.
Girl: What do you mean you wouldn’t know? It’s pussy.
Guy: I wouldn’t know. I’m gay.
Girl: Damn, son. So what does dick smell like?
Guy: Wouldn’t you know? I mean when you get on your knees?

–M14D bus

Overheard by: Janelle Someone

Girl on cell: I know! $100 for pills that aren’t even for something that important….it’s not like they’re AIDS pills!

–Carroll Gardens

Chick #1: You know why guys don’t like mushrooms?
Chick #2: Who said guys don’t like mushrooms?
Chick #1: Because they taste like cum!

–N train

Teacher lady: What a deep, deep black!
Girl #1: Black like my soul.
Teacher lady: Maybe you should try pencil.
Girl #2: Wait what did you say?
Girl #1: It’s black like my soul.
Girl #2: You should get a kitty.

–Dominican Academy, East 68th Street

Overheard by: cemo