Chinese guy: I hear people in third world countries are so hungry they eat people.
White girl: I know. I wonder, like, whether they have a conscience about it.
Chinese guy: Well, I imagine they don’t eat their own children, you know? Probably just someone else’s. It would be easier to do that, I think.
White girl: Yeah, I totally agree.
–Columbia University
Girl: I can’t believe they’re making a live action Transformers movie.
Guy: Whatever, I will definitely go see it.
Girl: Are you even old enough to remember Transformers?
Guy: Of course, I’m only three years younger than you.
Girl: Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you were old enough to be conscious of Transformers. My brothers are your age and they don’t remember the show that well.
Guy: You do realize every time you ask me that it doesn’t make me seem young, right? It just makes you seem old.
–26th & Madison
Overheard by: DL
Mom taking photos of son: Smile, sweetie.
[click click]
Mom: Smile from within, honey.
[click click]
Mom: Smiling from within means smile like you’re happy on the inside.
[click click]
Mom: Okay, not that much.
–Prospect Park
Man: I can’t believe how many immigrants there are.
Woman: Send ’em all back, what do I care.
Man: Isn’t, like, your mom an immigrant? We all came from immigrants, you know.
Woman: Wah wah, send ’em back.
–D train, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Lauren Michelle
A little girl is climbing onto an outdoor table, reaching for an ashtray.
Mom: No honey, don’t touch that.
Dad: Yeah, that’s what killed grandma.
–Soda Bar, Brooklyn
Overheard by: this guy
Guy: Yeah, that’s the first thing I learned when I moved here: don’t eat street meat, it’s probably pigeon or something.
Girl #1: Yeah, I wish I could get my husband to stop eating it.
Girl #2: I don’t care what kind of meat it is as long as it’s in my mouth.
Girl #1: That’s my sister; she’s looking for a hook-up.
Girl #2: No, I’m not!
Guy: I’m married.
–Irving Plaza, Irving Place
Overheard by: Johnny Tremain
Dad: Did you bring your book?
Teen boy: Yeah.
Dad: Oh good; that way we don’t have to talk.
–Tekserve, West 23rd Street
Overheard by: Bethany Murphy
Woman: Yo, my cousin is going to be on American Idol.
Guy: Wow, she any good?
Woman: No, she’s terrible, she sounds like a dying seal.
–36th & 7th
Overheard by: Brian
Chick #1: Why do those stone people on the side of the courthouse look so happy? Family court isn’t happy.
Chick #2: Yeah, if that were a real family, one would be holding a shovel, and the other one holding a fork.
–Downtown Brooklyn
Guy #1: You don’t have one gay relative?
Guy #2: Well, maybe my junkie cousin.
–7th Street & 2nd Avenue
