Hobo: Does anyone have some food? I’m so hungry, please!
Guy: I think I have an apple in my bag.
Hobo: I got no teeth! I got no teeth! I don’t want your apple!
Guy: How the hell do you expect to get any food without teeth?
–2/3 train
Hobo: Does anyone have some food? I’m so hungry, please!
Guy: I think I have an apple in my bag.
Hobo: I got no teeth! I got no teeth! I don’t want your apple!
Guy: How the hell do you expect to get any food without teeth?
–2/3 train
Teen girl: Like, I thought he was Jewish but then he ate a gyro so I dumped him.
Teen boy: That’s rough. Did he have it with that white sauce?
Teen girl: What difference does that make? Shit, you’re dumb.
–F train
Overheard by: Steph Gold
Lady: Geez, what an adventure, huh? I mean, “grande ensalada”? I had no idea what I’d ordered until it came to the table!
–55th & Madison
Overheard by: Heather
Hobo: She eats the cole slawwww. She likes the Pepsi, not the Coke!
–Borough Park
Russian lady: How many times do I have to tell you? Puerto Ricans don’t eat tacos.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Jonathan
Man: We have to stop here so I can eat. If we keep walking, I can’t eat in the rain.
–23rd & Madison
Woman: It’s spiritual. I only eat yak.
–11th & A
Overheard by: Lisa D
Girl on cell: OK, well, get me as many cans of tuna as you can possibly carry.
–Washington Square & East 4th
Senior VP on phone: No, you can’t order Chilean sea bass anymore! They’re all bred artificially in ponds. The real ones are going extinct out of sheer deliciousness.
–Madison Avenue office
Woman: It’s too hot today for Indian food. Well unless, you know, you’re Indian.
–17th & Park
Overheard by: Robyn
Drunk hobo: Excuse me, sir, do you have Michael Jackson’s phone number?
–Central Park
Overheard by: alec
Girl on cell: Like, how many miles are in a square mile?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Glynnis
Guy on cell: No. You don’t understand. These girls are hungry. Tofu is not going to fucking do it.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Hambone Bootblack
Jogger lady: Oh, great, it’s raining. Thanks a lot, God.
–Central Park
Overheard by: mj
Man: That guy’s got a chicken. He’s gonna burn it! Hey man, don’t hurt the animals! He’s gonna burn the chicken!
–Tompkins Square Park
Overheard by: Alex Romanovich
Man: Yo, what are you selling?
Vendor: Gelato.
Man: What’s that?
Vendor: Read the sign…Fuck you.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Chris
Tourist guy: So what’s the difference between Korean and Chinese?
New York guy: You mean the food, or the people?
Tourist guy: Either one. But I only care about the food.
–Bayard & Mulberry
Overheard by: iiams
Panhandler: Forty dollars…anybody got forty dollars so I can eat? Anybody, forty dollars?
Businessguy: Forty dollars?
Panhandler: You want to make a deal? All right, thirty-five dollars.
–57th & 5th
Overheard by: Heather
Asian guy: She’s crazy. She’s obsessed with death!
Pudgy White guy: But she’s hot.
Black guy: So what?
Pudgy White guy: Yeah, she’s crazy…but she’s hot. They kind of balance each other out, you know?
–F train
Overheard by: emdashes
Boyfriend: What about kitty?
Girlfriend: Oh, I could eat kitty. No really, I could make a great stir-fry with the cat.
Boyfriend: You would eat my cat?
Girlfriend: Ah, that would be a great way to get at you: eat your cat.
–St. Mark’s Place
American businesschick: How is your food?
Russian businesschick: It’s OK, but my salad is cold.
–Cosi, 45th & 3rd
Woman #1: They have a new water called “Smart Water”.
Woman #2: Oh yeah? What’s up with that?
Woman #1: I don’t know…I guess it makes you smart or something.
–96th & Columbus
Overheard by: Paco
