Girl: What time is it, 5:30? I’m not even supposed to be out.
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Because I’m in Milan!
–23rd St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Sara
Girl: What time is it, 5:30? I’m not even supposed to be out.
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Because I’m in Milan!
–23rd St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Sara
Guy #1: Can someone push eight? I guess I forgot. [Disembarks at eighth floor.]Guy #2: Something about the way he said that made me want to hit him.
–NYU dorm elevator
Guy: Naw, you just stuck on stupid. I told you, you should’ve dropped down and sucked that nigga’s dick.
Girl, resigned: Yeah…
–1st & Union, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Nat
Girl: Last night we went to a party in New Jersey.
Guy: On purpose?
–Cherry Tree Bar, 4th Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: ashley friedman
Guy #1: So, what would you do if Superman were real and flew in through your room window?
Guy #2: You mean, besides having my feet behind my ears?
–Loews Theatre, Lincoln Square
Overheard by: Shea
Guy #1: You said she’s a slut.
Guy #2: Yeah, but I didn’t mean that. You can’t just quote me verbatim!
Guy #1: Wait, what?
Guy #3: Hahaha! How else can he quote you if it’s not verbatim?!
–Columbia University
Woman: Oh, you got an iced coffee? Where do they sell those around here?
Man: This is actually Hennessey.
–Church Ave
Overheard by: Rez
Chick #1: Can you hand me my eye drops? They’re in my bag.
Dude: What do you need them for?
Chick #1: My eye-ritis.
Dude: Wait… Eye-ritis? Like arthritis?
Chick #1: Yeah…
Chick #2: Guess how she got it? She slapped herself! [Laughs.]Chick #1: And now I probably have AIDS.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Noah Tizzle
Chick: So, wait — he’s dating her?
Dude: Yeah…
Chick: But he lives with his ex-boyfriend?
Dude: Of 13 years. Yes.
Chick: Hmmm.
–Ace Bar, 5th St, between Ave A & B
Overheard by: santa’s boy toy
Man: Yeah, I’m from the middle of nowhere in Pennsylvania.
Professor: Oh? Do you commute here?
Man: No, sir… It’s over a seven-hour drive.
Professor: Oh, yes… Right. Pennsylvania…
–W 12th St, New School
Overheard by: CARA!
