Young mom, picking daughter’s nose: I see something in there!
Little girl turns head an picks own nose: I’ll get it!
Young mom, going in again: Don’t pick your nose!
–A train
Overheard by: amused
Young mom, picking daughter’s nose: I see something in there!
Little girl turns head an picks own nose: I’ll get it!
Young mom, going in again: Don’t pick your nose!
–A train
Overheard by: amused
Woman: A hundred dollars worth of squeaky toys and you eat garbage off the floor! I don’t get it.
–22nd & 7th
Overheard by: debo
Teenage boy: Once I hit the blind kid that lives downstairs with a ball and I felt so bad but it had me thinking, “what if he got his sight back by me hitting him?”. I would be like, “yo, you have your sight back thanks to me, give me some money.”
–2 train
Girl on cell: Your ass is, like, slightly cuter than my face.
–Union Square
White guy: Baby, do you know how much I love you? (rubs the most sensitive part of her eye)
Asian woman: (long pause)
White guy: Did you hear me?
Asian woman: Okay… You know what? I love affection, but I am not getting any younger and you're making my crow's foot worse!
–F Train
Overheard by: BJ
A group of retards are being watched by two caretakers.
Hetard: You’re stupid.
Shetard: Shut up. You have halitosis of the eye. Every time you blink, you stink!
–Battery Park
Overheard by: Josh Rav
Man #1: Your kid actually wants to go to the doctor?
Man #2: Yeah, he can’t stop thinkin’ about ’em.
Man #1: Thinking about what?
Man #2: Boobs! He can’t stop thinking about boobs!
–12th & Broadway
Ghetto girl #1: Damn, yo! What the fuck is up wit your left eye? It’s dumb red!
Ghetto girl #2: Nah, it ain’t even like that. There was a shootout.
Ghetto girl #1: You got shot in the eye? How the fuck…?
Ghetto girl #2: Yeah, he was trying to come on my mouth and missed and shot some into my eye.
Ghetto girl #1: Damn! Who the fuck he think you was? Jenna Jameson or something? Keep on doing that kinky shit, now look at your dumb fucked-up ass.
–Simpson Street station
Overheard by: schizo diva
Woman #1: So, your vagina’s open, right?
Woman #2: …yeah.
Woman #1: And there’s a smell.
Woman #2: Um.
Woman #1: And it’s a very personal smell!
–Broadway & Waverly
20-something grunge girl #1: So I plan on getting really trashed tonight, do you think I can crash there tonight?
20-something grunge girl #2: I wouldn't recommend it. Last time I crashed there I ended up with scabies.
–L Train
Overheard by: Anthony's Gal
Woman #1: My throat hurts. I guess I need another beer.
Woman #2: Mine too. Good idea.
–72nd & Central Park West
Overheard by: A. Pincus
Pregnant lady: My tummy hurts, it's either gas or the baby.
Husband: How can you tell the difference?
Pregnant lady: By which exit is used.
–Katz Deli
Overheard by: M. McOrmick
