Girl: This isn’t right. We’re supposed to be on Murray Street.
Guy: Dude, you know I’m dyslexic!
–Warren & Greenwich
Girl: This isn’t right. We’re supposed to be on Murray Street.
Guy: Dude, you know I’m dyslexic!
–Warren & Greenwich
Guy: Your breath stinks, get away from me!
Girl: I just woke up. Imagine if the Prince had said that to Snow White? You think her breath smelled so great?
–98th & Columbus
Overheard by: Danielle Harris
Doorman: Out for your morning power walk?
Old woman: Power walk? I’d fucking drop dead before I got to the corner.
–55th between 5th & 6th
Woman: His breath stinks. It smells like…it smells like shit to me. He’s gay, that’s why. He’s always suckin’ it, you know.
–Delancey Street station
Overheard by: Palaverist
Mom: I’d hate to drop dead of a heart attack, but I’d rather it be at Six Flags.
–W train
Chick #1: Oh look, you’ve got color back in your cheeks! What did they give you?
Chick #2: Oxygen.
–St. Vincent’s, W. 12th Street
Fashionista #1: Oh my God. I am so tired!
Fashionista #2: Me too. Let’s make this quick because I totally want to go home like right now.
Fashionista #1: Okay. You know, I think the key to a successful shopping trip is spending only a couple of hours at each store.
Fashionista #2: Definitely. Anything more just makes my blood sugar get too low, you know?
–Macy’s fitting rooms, West 34th Street
Overheard by: Lindsay
Guy: I’m so fucking sweaty. I’m getting all chafed again!
Girl: Aw, where?
Guy: On my cock.
Girl: Un your calf? That is so horr-
Guy: No, no, on my cock.
Girl: Chafed on your what?
Guy: My cock is chafed. Christ.
–Union Square
Receptionist lady: What’s your name?
Little boy: Nayan.
Receptionist lady: Can you spell that for me?
Little boy: N-A-Y-A-N.
Receptionist lady: Did your mommy tell you what your name means?
Little Boy: X-ray vision.
–Doctor’s office, Park Slope
Overheard by: Rachel
Waiter: If the Health Department showed up now we’d be out of business tomorrow.
–Barrymore’s, W. 45th Street
