Chick on cell: It’s a long story involving a lot of urine, but the gist of it is, we can’t use that refrigerator ever again.
–Madison Square Garden ladies’ room
Chick on cell: It’s a long story involving a lot of urine, but the gist of it is, we can’t use that refrigerator ever again.
–Madison Square Garden ladies’ room
Man: She needs to be on something.
Woman: She is; haven’t you seen all the medicine bottles on her desk?
Man: She’s got medicine on her desk? Let’s go get some.
–50th & 8th
Overheard by: Jelly Bean
Girl: Why don’t you just make a list of things I need to change about myself so I can be more like you?
Guy: Okay, let’s start with your tooth brushing. How about rinsing off the toothbrush before you put it back into the cabinet so there is not old toothpaste and spit dripping off of it? And how about rinsing after you brush?
Girl: Anything else?
Guy: No, I think that’s the only thing you need to change about yourself.
–88th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Bill
Girl: I have to go to the doctor soon.
Guy: Why?
Girl: Because I can’t breathe.
Guy: That’s not good.
Girl: Yeah, my dad doesn’t think so either.
–Rubin Hall Residence, 5th Avenue
Guy on cell: I don’t think it’s time yet to do the professional intervention thing. I mean if she drops down below 90, then maybe it’s time. But I’d like to her get down to 95, then she would be hot. As long as she doesn’t lose those 5 in her tits. Shit, she has nice tits.
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Tween girl #1: Aren’t you gonna wash your hands?
Tween girl #2: I don’t need to. I flush with my foot
Tween girl #1: Do you also wipe with your foot?
–Union Square Regal Cinemas ladies’ room
Girl: It’s not that it’s small, it’s just…not that big.
Guy: I wish we could stop talking about this now.
Girl: …Maybe you could just stop shaving.
–CompUSA, 57th & Broadway
Overheard by: Leonor M.
Man #1: Yo! You just picked your nose! You’re not gonna wash your hands first?
Man #2: Why? It’s not like I picked your nose.
–24 Prince, Prince Street
Overheard by: Steve D
Old man: You are the most beautiful woman in the world.
Girl: Aw, thanks!
Guy: She has crabs!
–Times Square 1/2/3 station
Overheard by: Meaghan Stefaniak
Teen girl #1: She once said to me, “I was thinking about us kissing in the shower.”
Teen girl #2: I hope you were wearing clothes.
–Canal & Broadway
Guy #1: Does she even shower?
Guy #2: That’s what I asked him. But then he said, “Not only does she shower, but then she licks my ass and jacks me off. It’s fucking great!”
–22nd & 3rd
Overheard by: Erin B
Man #1: You smell great!
Man #2: Thanks. I haven’t bathed since eleven.
–70th & Amsterdam
