Guy: The only reason she was hanging out with those dudes is because she was hoping that one of them would kill me…But that’s neither here nor there.
–6 train
Guy: The only reason she was hanging out with those dudes is because she was hoping that one of them would kill me…But that’s neither here nor there.
–6 train
Girl: I know you’re not religious, but do you believe in dinosaurs?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Sasha
Chick #1: Yeah, but I can’t keep fucking him.
Chick #2: Why not?
Chick #1: Because I’m not in love with him.
Chick #2: Oh. Well, how did you fuck him till now?
Chick #1: Usually with me on top.
–Clinton & Rivington
Girl on cell: Can you hear me when I roll my eyes?
–82nd & York
Chick on cell: It’s a long story involving a lot of urine, but the gist of it is, we can’t use that refrigerator ever again.
–Madison Square Garden ladies’ room
Teen girl: Now what she needs is a razor dildo.
–93rd & Broadway
Overheard by: Alissa R.
Drunk guy: Well, here we are.
Drunk girl: This isn’t my station.
Drunk guy: I was following you!
Drunk girl: Well, there’s a reason I asked you to walk me to the subway.
Drunk guy: Wow, the blind leading the blind.
Drunk girl: More like the oblivious leading the retarded.
–Broadway-Nassau Street station
Guy #1: Is she blind or something?
Guy #2: No, she’s Christian.
Guy #1: Oh…Same thing I guess.
–11th & B
Guy #1: Dude, all this Groundhog Day shit is bullshit. It is impossible for something to not have a shadow. All things that move have shadows. If it don’t move, then it don’t have a shadow. Groundhog Day is bullshit.
Guy #2: Dude, you’re a dumbass. Only living things have shadows.
–5th Avenue & 9th Street
Overheard by: Kori Hensell
Girl #1: So, I think I’m gonna name my kid Senator. Isn’t that great? I’m going to name him Senator, but he won’t have to ever aspire to anything. Imagine in, like, third grade: Senator Nelson!
Girl #2: Ha, ha! I think I want to name my kid Does.
Girl #1: Would you spell it D-o-e-s?
Girl #2: Yeah, totally. Isn’t that a great name?
Girl #1: I’m going to have either a kid or a monkey named Chimapate.
–3rd & B
Overheard by: Jenya
