Tourist woman: I had no idea the Guggenheim Museum was so cheesy looking. What’s it made out of? Is that papier mache or something?
Tourist man: Well, I remember reading somewhere that Frank Lloyd Wright really was a nut.
–5th Ave. & 88th St.
Overheard by: Galen Chistopher
White guy: I’m a pretty liberal-minded guy. I don’t consider myself prejudiced or anything…
White girl: But..?
White guy: But I really don’t like Polish people. I mean, I can’t help it, I just don’t.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Kristen
Old woman: Did you see this play?
Old man: Yes.
Old woman: Well, do you know who the father of the baby is?
Old man: Well, I know it wasn’t me.
–59th & Park
Wife: Just give me the whole chicken.
Hubby: The what?
Wife: I asked for the whole chicken and that’s what I wanted. Is that too much to ask?
Hubby: What were you going to do with a whole chicken?
Wife: …it’s just principle.
–Metro-North train
Overheard by: B.E.
Guy #1: Dude, I think you have a porn addition.
Guy #2: 5 gigabytes is not an addiction!
–Midwood Public Library
Overheard by: Roman S
Man: Did you just cut me in line?
Girl: I’m sorry sir, I just–
Man: Oh yes you did. Gosh, I hate New York.
–DB Bistro Moderne, W. 44th St.
Man in fur coat and matching hat: Excuse me, where can I find the sanitation napkins?
–Rite Aid, Morningside Heights
Overheard by: Katie
Man on cell: I didn’t know it was your baby crying! I thought you were watching some animal show. I wouldn’t have made the comment about the hyena if I knew it was your baby!…Well, yeah, I probably would have…hey, whatever happened to you and ugly-ass Omar?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Krista Gundersen
Woman: That Chinese food was so cheap.
Man #1: That’s because it was either dog or koala meat.
Man #2: Aren’t koalas endangered?
Man #1: No, they’re not endangered. They’re just starving.
–Downtown elevator
Old guy: I’d like two tickets to Times Square please.
Booth lady: What?
Old guy: Two for Times Square please!
–Whitehall Street station
