Moms

Little boy to mom at Native American exhibit: Oh! Weapons!
Mom: Yeah, those are weapons, but we don't like them because they hurt people and are used during wars.
Little boy: President Bush started a war!
Mom: Yes he did, and that's why we don't like him.

–The Museum of Natural History

Overheard by: Hanna!

Well-heeled mother: Now, what do we call little baby kangaroos?
Four-year-old boy: Marsupials!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: hells kitchen dweller

Mom: So, what's your third-favorite place in the world?
Young daughter: I just burped.
Mom: That's nice.

–103rd & Broadway

Overheard by: Special K

Mother to son: Timmy, stop eating your boogers! It's disgusting!
Timmy: But it's tasty! You should try it too!
Mother, whispering: Oh, shit.

–Chelsea

Professor: I hate that bitch so much, I will give you all As for this semester if you sabotage her class.

–Classroom, NYU

Overheard by: queenofscots

Four-year-old boy to mom holding up newspaper clipping of female model: I can't use this, I hate women!

–Union Square

Overheard by: amused

Little blonde girl sitting at table with parents: I hate everyone!

–48th St & 30th Ave

Overheard by: kteezy

Loud girl to man at the counter: Hey, what are you looking at me like that for? (man at the counter shakes head) You know damn well what I am talking about…I love you too. (pause) Nawwww, just kidding…I hate your stinky ass.

–Deli, Nostrand Ave & Kings Highway

Small boy, gleefully: I hate Joe the plumber. Joe, Joe, Joe…I hate Joe.

–Barnes & Noble

Overheard by: me too…

Planned Parenthood, Dear Reader. Seriously.

Mom to crying baby: Oh my god, shut the hell up!

–Q Train

Overheard by: Jay

Five-year-old girl, watching NYU protest: Mommy, what is going on?
Mom: Oh. it's just kids who don't want to pay for tuition.
Five-year-old girl, screaming to protesters: Pay your tuition!

–NYU

Small boy: So abortion isn't like killing, it's like stopping?
Small boy's mother: Yes, honey…it's all very complicated, but, some people think that a baby can't be killed when it's inside the womb because it's not really a baby yet.
Small boy: So, it's not a baby till it's out?
Small boy's mother: That's right.
Small boy: And then we can kill them?

–M103 Bus

Overheard by: Lilly

British teen: My god, Americans are so stupid. And they're everywhere.
British mom: Oh, darling… I know, bloody morons. So stupid.
(a block later)
British teen: Mum, where's the Empire State Building?
British mom: Oh honey, that's in Chicago.

–7th and 48th

Gramps: Those bags from the store…
(children and mother laugh).
Mother: You're talking very loud.
Gramps: What–are we in church? Did I wake somebody up?
(children and mother continue laughing)
Gramps: What did I do wrong? Should I go sit outside?

–Doctor's Office, Central Park West

Overheard by: Erick B