(a guy is selling brightly colored books titled How to Roll a Blunt for Dummies)
Five-year-old kid: Mommy, whats that book about???
Mother (flustered and pushing him away): Umm…umm…uhhh… Honey, not all books are educational!
–Penn Station
(a guy is selling brightly colored books titled How to Roll a Blunt for Dummies)
Five-year-old kid: Mommy, whats that book about???
Mother (flustered and pushing him away): Umm…umm…uhhh… Honey, not all books are educational!
–Penn Station
Baby thug: Why do you yell at me so loud when you're angry?
Mama thug: I never yell at you when I'm angry.
Baby thug: But, mama, you always yell at me so loud when you're angry.
Mama thug: Yeah, I do. It's because I'm so angry.
–Sunset park, Brooklyn
Mother of four-year-old boy (looking at display case): Wait up for me, Jack. Don't go on the escalator without me.
Four-year-old boy: It's okay, I can do it.
Mother of four-year-old: No, Jack. Wait for me.
Four-year-old boy: It's okay, mom. I can go up by myself.
Mother of four-year-old: Jack. Don't go up without me.
Four-year-old boy: Mom. It's okay. I can do it. I'm wearing my lucky Batman underwear.
–Macy's
(toddler in stroller gleefully tosses mangoes from display on floor)
Older brother: No! Stop it! (picks up mangoes as toddler keeps pushing them off display) Stop! We're not buying those!
(mom looks the other way)
Cashier: Ma'am, your child is dropping the mangoes.
Mom: I know.
Cashier: But..
Mom: I know, my son's rude.
Cashier: But the other customers…
Mom: He does this all the time, you should come to my house and
see what he does.
–Gourmet Garage, 96th & Park Ave
Overheard by: Mark
Seven-year-old girl to her mom: I have more jewelry than you! I have more jewelry than you!
Mother: Like many things in life, this is not a competition.
Girl: Of course it's a competition!
–West Broadway & Broome Street, SoHo
Overheard by: And I thought people would be quoting me…
(family stands facing the empire state building)
Tourist son: Mom, which one is the Empire State Building?
Tourist mom: I think it's the one with the circley top. (points to the Chrysler Building)
Tourist dad: No, honey, it's the one way out there, on the water.
Tourist son #2: That's the Statue of Liberty. (to no one in paritcular) I can't believe I'm part of this fucking family.
–Top of the Rock
Overheard by: Melissa
Mom: Give me my phone.
Son: Photo?
Mom: No, you cannot take a picture.
Son (sticking phone in the butt of his pants): Please.
Mom: No, it's too loud. At home…
–NJ Transit
Little boy looking out window: I want to take the NYU shuttle when I go to college!
Mother: You can, if you go to NYU.
Little boy: Ohh. Nevermind.
–M103 Downtown
Man: Holy shit!
Little child: Ooooohh! Mommy, he said shit.
Mother: Don't worry, it's holy.
–Liberty Avenue
Overheard by: Karina
Little fat boy: Moooom?
Very fat mom: Yes, sweetie?
Little fat boy: I can't wait until grandma dies so I can have a cat.
Outrageously fat dad: He's so creative, isn't he? (pats fat boy on the head)
–7 Train
Overheard by: Celebrifi.com
