Male hipster: I was all excited for Central Park, you know, and then I remembered: I've seen trees before.
–Central Park
Tourist, looking at souvenir photos of Central Park: You never realize how… central it is.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Xanthias
Tourist, looking down at map: Wait a second, guys, I can't find Central Park.
–Penn Station
Overdressed, overly made-up girl: The thing I don't like about Central Park is that it's too much like a forest.
–Central Park
Two tourists spot the people camped out in front of the Mexican Consulate.
Tourist #1: Are all those people trying to get tickets to a concert or something?
Tourist #2: Maybe. Do you think that’s Radio City?
–39th & Madison
Chica on cell: He was just white. Like, a white guy. Except Puerto Rican.
–Park Terrace West, Inwood
Overheard by: Gringo Starr
Puerto Rican thug to another, both wearing Puerto Rican flag bandanas as face masks: White people better get used to us. There be like 80 billion of us in the world… Or maybe 8 thousand of us…at least.
–F Train
Overheard by: Brent
Teen on cell: Wait, you're in Puerto Rico? I'll be right there, that's by Chinatown, right? What do you mean it's an island? Like Staten Island? How the fuck did you get there?
–Colombus Circle
Overheard by: Graham Davis
JAP on phone: He called me a clingy JAP! How fucking low! I could've easily pulled the "you're-a-Puerto-Rican-from-Staten-Island" card.
–92nd & 5th
Guy (shouting): Hey guys! You like Puerto Ricans?!
–Times Square
Overheard by: CytoFox
Dad on scooter with eight-year-old girl: I don't want to hear that… Don't fuckin' push me, Joanna! You are not black, you are Puerto Rican!
–Flatbush & Fulton
Overheard by: Chelsea
Non-hipster dude: I've looked everywhere, I can't find a soda anywhere!
Non-hipster friend: It's Williamsburg. I don't think they have soda.
–Brooklyn
Little girl: Mommy! Is that Times Square!? I see lights, mommy! It's Times Square!
Mommy: Umm… Where, honey? We're not there yet.
Little girl: Yes, we are! Look, mommy! Look at the lights! Peep World, mommy! Peep World!
–33rd St & 7th Ave
Overheard by: I want that to be my kid.
(#106 bus arrives)
Black woman to white woman: You know if this bus is going to East Harlem?
White woman: Yes, I know.
Black woman: Oh, okay. I was just making sure you knew where you were going.
–96th St & Amsterdam
Daughter: Dad, where are we getting off?
Father: Um…42nd Street…Times Square…Grand Central Parkway…something like that.
Daughter: 142nd street?
Father: Yeah, something like that.
(doors open for Penn Station)
Mother: I think we should get off here.
Father and daughter: Yeah.
–Uptown 2 Train
Punk boy: Which way is Delancey Street?
Stoop guy: That’s Delancey.
Punk girl: Well, they must have moved it then.
–Essex between Delancey & Rivington
JAP: So he, like, lives in Brooklyn. On purpose.
Three friends: Ewww…
–LIRR
Guy pedalling rickshaw, on cell: No, I can’t get there. I have no bike right now. No, I’m on the train at the moment.
–34th & Broadway
Man on cell: No, I’m not outside!…I’m in the bank!…I’m in the bank…I’m telling you, I’m in the bank!
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Middle-Eastern dude on cell: Right now I am coming in a taxi cab from JFK Airport…Yes, well, I understand your concern, but you see, I am driving the taxi.
–Starbucks, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: math tinder
