Tourist: Wow, it’s like a whole underground city thing here!
Local: I dont know any freaks who would want to live in a city like this.
–Times Square subway station
Overheard by: LSB
Tourist: Wow, it’s like a whole underground city thing here!
Local: I dont know any freaks who would want to live in a city like this.
–Times Square subway station
Overheard by: LSB
Guy: Let me ask you something: A lady sits down next to you on the train and you keep inching towards me. Why? When a lady sits down, you inch towards her, not me! Why are you inchin’ towards me? What’s wrong with New Yorkers, all scared of women?
–Brooklyn-bound L train
Overheard by: Alana C
Suit: Goddamn piece of fucking shit.
Old lady: Geez.
Suit: What’s your fucking problem?
Old lady: The dumbing down of our language; everyone is so crude. Suit: Where are you from, the Little House on the Prairie?
Old lady: I’m from New York, you fucking asshole.
–47th & 5th
Overheard by: Anne Turner
Tourist lady: Wow, it’s like a sea of people!
B&T guy: Welcome to the city that never sleeps!
NY woman: Fuck all of you.
–Times Square station
Overheard by: Emily A
(excited dog jumps onto lady)
Lady: Oh, why are you so frisky?
Dog walker: He's a puppy.
Lady: Oh, so he's new to New York? Soon he'll be just as jaded and angry as the rest of us.
–32nd & 2nd
Overheard by: Tacomeat
Atlantic Avenue announcement: The 2, 3, 4, 5, b and q trains are not running into Manhattan. As an alternative, take the n, d, or r trains.
Pacific Street announcement: The n, d and r trains are not running into Manhattan. As an alternative, take the 2, 3, 4, 5, b or q trains.
–Atlantic/Pacific Subway Station
Overheard by: Jen Diff
Old Chinese lady: No luggage allowed. Leave it outside. This is my building! I own it!
(College kid, obviously from out of town, leaves in fear)
Old Chinese lady: Puta!
(college kid scurries away)
College kid on cell: Yeah, I did what they say on Law & Order. Never make eye contact with a New Yorker.
–Penn Station Entrance
Overheard by: kash
Young girl: Ummm…sir, would you like some help with those directions?
Crazy dude: Yes! Thank you.
Young girl: So you have to take this train to 42nd…
Crazy dude: What I need to know is, do I have to be in the front of the train, or the back of the train, to get the shuttle?
Young girl: It doesn’t matter. You just ride this train to 42nd and you get off and look for the shuttle. It doesn’t matter which car you’re in.
Crazy dude: You see, I need to get my head fixed, and I need to know which car…
Conducter: Need some help?
Crazy dude: Yes, thank you. I need to get the shuttle at 42nd St. Do I have to be in the front of the train, or the back?
Conducter: In the middle.
Crazy dude: Thank you!
–A train
Guy to security guard: We're not fucking tourists, man, we're just trying to get back to our home in Jersey.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Confabulation Nation
Metrosexual guy: There are two kinds of people I will never, ever, date. One are people who are culturally ignorant. The second is people from New Jersey.
–45th & 5th
Overheard by: Mr. Pink
Proper British woman to loud drunk guy: Go back to Jersey!
–BB King Concert, Christ United Church
Overheard by: bb
Uptight 40-something white guy: I can't wait to get safely back in New Jersey!
–A Train
Overheard by: JoshBob
Girl to boyfriend, on the 4th of July: I love it here, *this* is America!
Woman passing by: No, honey, this is New York.
–Outside Grand Central
Overheard by: Lee
Chick #1: The East Village is so gentrified.
Chick #2: Yeah. Brooklyn is really gentrified. It didn’t used to be like that.
Chick #1: America… is pretty gentrified.
Chick #2: Yeah.
–St. Marks & A
Overheard by: Dav Ellman
