Hoochie #1: I am such a make-out slut!
Hoochie #2: I used to be a make-out slut, too, but then I went pro.
–Grand Central shuttle to Times Square
Overheard by: Danielle
Hoochie #1: I am such a make-out slut!
Hoochie #2: I used to be a make-out slut, too, but then I went pro.
–Grand Central shuttle to Times Square
Overheard by: Danielle
Gay guy: Where are we going?
Straight girl: Nowhere Bar. Have you been there before?
Gay guy: I don't think so. Oh no! Wait! Someone blew me there in college!
Straight girl: For the last effing time, I do not need to hear these things about my big brother!
–F Train
Girl #1: I still can’t believe he cheated on you with her.
Girl #2: I know, right? Like, what does she have that I don’t?
Girl #1: I don’t know. Bigger tits?
Girl #2: Who cares? Mine are nicer. Plus I bet you I could do anything and everything better than her in bed. And, she’s slept with so many people that I bet her vagina is fucking sagging.
Girl #1: Yeah, they probably wouldn’t be able to tell if it was even in yet. Besides, you could probably catch an STD just by looking at her.
–E train
Overheard by: amanda
Guy #1: I think I’m done dating girls that people have heard of.
Guy #2: Duuude.
–Barnes & Noble
Gangsta retail guy: So this party last night was for real, totally got blasted, couldn't even wake up this morning…
Gay retail guy: I'd come to one of your parties, but all you guys do is get wasted.
Gangsta retail guy: Yeah, I'd go to one of your parties too, but all you guys do is fuck each other.
–Target, Bronx
Overheard by: Good Craic
Large maintenance man #1: Yo, you remember your little girl you left a while back?
Large maintenance man #2: Fuck, man, why you gotta bring that up?
Large maintenance man #1: I think I fucked her last night.
Large maintenance man #2: How the hell would you know that?
Large maintenance man #1: ‘Cause she made that face you make when you lift shit.
–15th St & Union Sq West
Overheard by: margo
Guy: You used to give everybody handjobs.
Girl: I was the master. I didn't know I was that good until I was giving them to everybody.
–Burp Castle, 7th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: I didn't get one
Sister #1: You know what Auntie Cathy* said last week? She said that, back in the 40’s, Aunt Mary* was a huge slut! She said, and I quote, “She had the clap so many times it amounted to applause.”
Sister #2: And I thought the only hobby she ever had was crocheting those ugly stuffed animals.
–Quizno’s, 14th & 3rd
Angry construction worker to befuddled construction worker: Don't look at me like that! Don't say that to me! Go home and fuck my wife, asshole!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Jumana
Construction working to another: Man, I need to get me a bi girlfriend. She'd be lovin' me, and I'd be lovin' her friends.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Rich R.
Construction worker, singing: If there's a skeeter on your Peter/whack it off! (claps twice)
–Waverly Place & 5th Ave
Overheard by: steph
Tough construction worker, unloading van: Yo, I was up til like 2 am watchin' Scooby Doo Where Are You!
–Humboldt & Withers
Overheard by: francesca
Construction worker, staring up at construction skyscraper: It's all twisted. It's going to come down.
–Williams St
Overheard by: Sonya
Girl #1: So, I heard your sister slept with another guy last night…
Girl #2: Yeah, I know. I love her, because she’s, like, my sister and all. But seriously, she’s going to get a fucking disease.
Girl #1: It’s really easy to. I mean, I only sleep with girls, and remember when I got one?
–Line for Ani D. concert, Central Park
Overheard by: tiffany.
