(woman #1 is having trouble walking in her very high heels)
Woman #2: Are those shoes channel?
Woman #1: Yes they are.
Woman #2: Wow. For that price, they should teach you how to walk in them.
–Park Ave & 57th St
(woman #1 is having trouble walking in her very high heels)
Woman #2: Are those shoes channel?
Woman #1: Yes they are.
Woman #2: Wow. For that price, they should teach you how to walk in them.
–Park Ave & 57th St
Man #1: You have kids?
Man #2: Yeah, four sons. All boys.
–Penn Station
Hipster girl #1 to waitress at Japanese restaurant: Hola. Como estas?
Hipster girl #2: Um, I don't think they speak Spanish.
Hipster girl #1: Well, they sure as hell don't speak English either.
–Zen, St. Mark's & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: amf
Woman leaving train to suit with open fly: (inaudible)
Suit (loudly): What is “the barn door is open?” What is that supposed to mean?
–6 Train
(during a game of wiffleball)
Guy #1: Dammit, Scott hit the fucking ball!
Guy #2: Shut up, Dave! Why are you so fucking fat?!
Guy #1: I'm fat? Well, why do you still have an incurable shitting disease?
Guy #2: Because it's incurable…dick!
–Tillary St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Dan Fuckin' Murphy
Girl #1: Is it paranoid to think that my mother is poisoning me?
Girl #2: No, not at all.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Mariya
Indian tourist to train conductor: How do I get to Florida from here?
Train conductor: Which part? Orlando or Miami?
–Shuttle Train, Grand Central
Overheard by: blue rock
Student: When installing software there are always these terms and conditions that you have to agree with, right? But nobody knows what they mean and nobody reads them. Could it be argued that that is a type of contract that cannot be enforced?
Contracts professor: Yes, definitely. (pause) Now, before you get too happy about that: you asked whether it could be argued.
–Columbia Law School
(talking about man with tattoos covering his arms)
Woman #1: Wow, can you believe that?
Woman #2: I know! I could never do that to my body.
Woman #1: Yeah! I mean, all my tattoos are in places you can't see.
–G Train
Overheard by: EFO
Headline by: tatoo-less
Runners-Up:
· “But My Colonoscopist Says They’re Lovely!” – Fred
· “For Only My Baby to Appreciate.” – KJM
· “Inside My Fat Rolls.” – Mike
· “Inside the Cover Of the Howard the Duck Collectors Edition DVD.” – KJM
· “That Gerbil Is the Most Talented Tattoo Artist I Know” – Treize
Hobo: Can you spare a donation to the united negro pizza fund?
–120th St & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Mikey T
Hobo: Would you like to make a donation to the united negro pastrami fund?
–21st & Park Ave
Overheard by: Lawrence C
Hobo: Hello ladies, would you like to donate to the united negro pastrami sandwich fund?
–Broadway, SoHo
Bum on street: Please give to the united negro pizza fund.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Squid
Hobo: Contribute to the united negro pastrami sandwich fund!
–Prince & Wooster
Black hobo to tourists: Would you like to donate to the united negro pastrami fund?
–Bleecker & Leroy
Overheard by: Lynn
Hobo: Please give to to the united negro pizza fund. A pepperoni is a terrible thing to waste. (30 minutes later) What's the best nation? A do-nation!
–Outside Buddha Bar
