Teen girl to girl friend: Hey, when are we getting our matching tattoos?
Guy friend to another: She's so serious.
–Duane Reade
Teen girl to girl friend: Hey, when are we getting our matching tattoos?
Guy friend to another: She's so serious.
–Duane Reade
20-ish guy: So, I should just ask: Can I come in and fuck your brains out?
20-ish girl: You don’t have to be all Tarantino about it, but yeah.
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Esther
Teenage girl: But she sucks a lot of dick for money!
Teenage boy: At least she’s getting paid! You suck a lot of dick for free! Who’s the winner in that situation?
–153rd St & Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: Emily
Loud Indian woman: Noodles are coming, right?
Waiter: You didn't order noodles.
Loud Indian woman: Oh.
Waiter: Do you want noodles?
Loud Indian woman: No.
–Indonesian Restaurant
Overheard by: Miss Carrie
Boy #1: What did you do last night?
Boy #2: I fucked what's-his-face last night.
Boy #1: You don't remember his name?
Boy #2: If it's under six inches, you don't get remembered!
–17th & 7th
Overheard by: Wyatt J
CCNY student: I've always thought he has psychological problems. (pause) Like, he's one of those people that has to flip the light switch 17 times or the whole world dies.
–Hallway, CCNY
Overheard by: ladyliver
Suit on cell: She is trying to get a good education so that she can pay for therapy later on.
–1250 Broadway
Loud male customer counting out packets of chewing tobacco: One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Ever since I quit my job at Sesame Street, I can't seem to live my life. Kermit is my shrink, so of course I'm screwed…
–Smoke Shop, Park Slope
Overheard by: Kiri
Dude hanging up his cell: Oh my god, I think all Jewish girls need therapy.
–Good Stuff Diner, 14th St
Overheard by: Kosi
Suit on cell: Dude, I know, but like, you either get help, or you're normal. (pause) No, dude, pick one, get help or be normal. Damn.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Sarah
History teacher to class: Does that make you uncomfortable? Because I know I'm mental.
–Bronx High School of Science
Overheard by: Lillian
Girl #1: What kind of restaurant is it?
Girl #2: It's like Red Lobster, without the seafood.
–Greenpoint, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Adina
Black postman #1: Kiss my black ass!
Black postman #2: How do you know that it’s black?
–Forest Hills post office
Girl #1: I just don’t know if I can love him anymore.
Girl #2, giggling: Why not?
Girl #1: Stop laughing! What would you do if your boyfriend had a thing for dolphin art?!
–East Village
Girl #1: Why does it seem like everyone in California gets married so young?
Girl #2: Because they're all hippie and happy and love each other and stuff… That's why we moved to New York.
–Lafayette & Houston
