Man on cell: I’ll be in Fort Lauderdale in 2 hours, wait for me.
–34th & 8th
Man on cell: I’ll be in Fort Lauderdale in 2 hours, wait for me.
–34th & 8th
Hipster chick #1: So, what did he wear on the way back into town?
Hipster chick #2: Nothing. He was totally naked.
Hipster chick #1: You were on some nudist island and didn’t know it.
Hipster chick #2: I’m telling you, it’s not a nudist island. It’s just Europe.
–14th St, between Ave B & Ave C
Teen boy: What kind of trains are those?
Woman: They’re called the PATH. They go to places like New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Long Island.
Teen boy: How about Staten Island?
Woman: Whatchu wanna go there for?
–M101 bus
Overheard by: Kimberly Johnson
Irate professional woman on cell: I raced down to Penn Station to buy a ticket to New Jersey, and now you tell me you're going to Hooters?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Erin and Willa
Blonde hipster: I knew I needed to get out of there when I heard her saying, "we should go to that bar next because it's near the PATH!"
–Rivington & Essex
Train conductor: The next stop is Park Place. Transfer is available to the a, c, e and PATH to Newwwwwwwwwww Jersey. I also have wonderful news that I am dying to tell you today. All 2 and 3 trains are making local stops this weekend. There are no express trains because of service changes.
–2 Train
Girl, interrupting singing couple: Guys, we need to class it up, we are not in Jersey anymore!
–5th Ave & 86th
Overheard by: GerMan in NY
Four-year-old boy: I don't wanna go to New Jersey!
–New Jersey Transit Terminal, Penn Station
Hipster: But you were in New Jersey when you got pregnant, it's okay.
–1st & St. Mark's
Guy #1: You’re useless…you keep getting dysentery.
Guy #2: Maybe you’re just a lousy trail leader.
Girl: At least he doesn’t drown every time we cross a river.
Guy #1: Hey, you caulk the wagon, you take some chances.
–79th Street 1 station
Man: So how have you been?
Woman: Oh, it’s been crazy. We just got plowed-into by a tractor-trailer. For the second time. It’s coming toward us and I’m looking at my husband and I’m thinking, ‘He’s going to die right here in front of me — and after all that chemotherapy!’
–Elevator, E 27th St
Overheard by: dr. schadenfreude
Park ranger: Boat to New Jersey to the left, New York to the right.
Guy heading to boats: Why would we ever want to go to New Jersey?
Park ranger: Good question.
K-9 cop: I guess you won't be visiting me… I'm living in exile over there.
–Liberty Island
Overheard by: ZANSR
Old lady: Please stop!
Conductor: I didn’t see you.
The train pulls away.
Old lady: Fuckhead.
–23rd Street F station
Woman: Where is there an elevator or ramp down to the lower tracks?
Info booth lady: Which track are you trying to get to?
Woman: It doesn’t matter…gate 120.
Info booth lady: We don’t have a gate 120. If you tell me where you’re really going, I’ll tell you how to get there!
–Grand Central
Shopgirl: You got to go to Hawaii for the summer? You’re so lucky!
Shopqueer: Not so lucky; I had to come back.
Shopgirl: At least you got to get out of the country.
–Urban Outfitters, Upper West Side
