Dark haired girl #1: No, no, you can have an operation to stitch your cherry back up to have it popped again!
Dark haired girl #2: But you can be born with a vagina like that!
–NYU
British professor: When I moved from England to the States I was always so surprised to hear people use the phrase, “I feel” this and “I feel” that…
NYU kid: Why?
British professor: Because we don't feel.
–Cantor Film Center, NYU
Professor: I don’t know why everyone’s in drag today. There are just some days like that.
Queer student: Oh, honey. That’s Saturday at my house.
–NYU Silver Center
Professor: … So this leads me to believe that probably none of you will be in competing with illegal Mexican immigrants for jobs.
Student: Oh, boy!
–NYU
Journalism professor: Can anyone, for extra credit, give me two words to describe this day that will go down in history?
Silence
Professor: I’ll give you a clue — it has to do with President Bush.
Random student: “Mission accomplished!”
Girl #1 to her friend: Mission Impossible? What does Tom Cruise have to do with Bush?
Girl #2: Yeah, I know, that movie isn’t even out yet!
–Silver Center, NYU
Girl: I haven't seen you in a while.
NYU security guard: Witness protection program. It's like a Bar Mitzvah for Italians.
–NYU
Professor: So I told my grad students they could have an A if they earned it, or if they beat me in a 12-minute cage fight.
–Fordham Universityy
Israeli politics professor, after class: There's enough Tylenol out there to take care of your hangovers after Purim. So, all your sorry little asses better be in this class at three o'clock, Wednesday afternoon.
–Yeshiva University
English professor: Yeah, the end of the poem relates to the beginning. Every good poem has a return… just like a good walk.
–Hunter college
Professor: Of course there was marital harmony! As we all know, the family who cuts drugs together, stays together.
–Fordham Law School
Overheard by: EntertainedStudent
Professor: An example of synecdoche would be, "get your ass over here." You want all of them, not just their ass. But sometimes, you do just want their ass. And we all know how that goes. But that sort of thing doesn't happen in a classroom… usually.
–NYU
Overheard by: queenofscots
Dude: Do you want to dance?
Chick: No, sorry, I have a boyfriend.
Dude: That’s okay, I’m gay.
Chick: Are you sure?
Dude: Am I sure? Yes! [Girl walks away.] Okay, fine, I’m not sure.
–Webster Hall, NYU
Drunk girl on bike #1: How's your nose?
Drunk girl on bike #2: How's your neck?
Drunk girl on bike #1: Hey, all I'm saying is that I'd rather get a hickey from a random boy I don't know than break my nose by falling off my bike. (falls off her bike) Shiiiiiiiiiiiit.
Girl #2: How's your fucking nose now, whore?
–NYU
Guy on cell: I'm gonna come over and give you a big hug before doomsday.
–Outside NYU Dorm
Guy holding up drunk friend: I have to hug the fat kid?! Why don't you try hugging a fat kid?
–LIRR, Penn Station
Overheard by: Laura
Hobo to startled girl: If you give me a dollar I won't hug you.
–7 Train
Small boy, loudly, after some take-off turbulence: The plane is going down… Everybody hug!
–Runway Strip, JFK
Overheard by: PSUny
