Man to cop: But if I shoot and kill someone in my home, it's no problem, right?
Cop: No problem here; but you might have a problem in Greece.
–30th Ave & 31st St
Overheard by: venniblue
Man to cop: But if I shoot and kill someone in my home, it's no problem, right?
Cop: No problem here; but you might have a problem in Greece.
–30th Ave & 31st St
Overheard by: venniblue
Girl: I'm not going home straight.
Boy: I think you mean “I'm not going straight home.”
Girl: No. I mean “I'm not going home straight.”
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Ghetto wannabe #1: Yo’ rhymes are so lame it’s like you took the cosine.
Ghetto wannabe #2: You so poor you go fishin’ for dimes.
–Woodhaven, Queens
Overheard by: drendar
Headline by: Against Marj
Runners-Up:
· “Bill and Hillary Prepare for Next Year’s Video Music Awards” – DoubleJ
· “Cosine? Like from Nigganometry?” – Big Larry
· “E = MC Hammer Squared” – Christina
· “M.C. Tangent and D.J. Non-Sequitur.” – SandmanEsq
· “My rhymes are so hype I can divide by zero, Burnin’ down the ghetto like my name is Nero” – mk
· “Whitey got no algorithm” – Charlie
· “Why Pythagorus never got sined.” – Julie Baber
· “Yo’ so dumb you only know pi to 3.14159” – arielle
Young guy on cell: You're lucky I'm Colombian. If I was Ecuadorian, I'd be slapping you!
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: Jobee
Angry man walking alone, to himself: I could have married a Dominican, but no, I decided not to!
–Mercer & Broome
Teen girl to friend: Your new Mexican is super creepy.
–On Line for the Colbert Report, Hell's Kitchen
Guy on cell: No, no, man, she's Puerto Rican. I'm just sayin' she's Dominican 'cause it sounds hotter.
–105 St & Lexington
Thug holding box of maxi pads: Yo, that motherfucker is like the gay Mexican Marlon Brando. Classic…
–CVS
Overheard by: Karen
Euro hipster #1: I got the soles of my shoes fixed.
Euro hipster #2: Your what?
Euro hipster #1 #1: You know, the soles of my shoes. The bottoms.
Euro hipster #2: I do not know this word.
Euro hipster #1: You know, S-O-U-L.
Euro hipster #2: Ah, like ass-soul?
–New York Sports Club, Astoria
Overheard by: Lizzy Vegas
Teen in sideways cap: I touched it, but I didn't like it.
–Uptown A Train
Overheard by: Ladle
Student: Dude, I think I'm dyslexic with stairs.
–Stuyvesant High School
Teen, seriously: No… Webkinz are definitely a lot more high-maintenance then neopets.
–Downtown 6 Train
Teenage boy: I want to be a Senator or something like that. Like, the Government is the best place to have sex.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Punk teen to friends: Even though it seemed like she was into things, now she's not into anything.
–Union Square
Overheard by: i don't like stuff either
Boy giving presentation: Guys, shut up! Everybody has to be quiet during my presentation.
Black boy: Man, your people kept my people down for hundreds of years. I ain't being quiet for your presentation!
Boy giving presentation: I'm not white, dude. I'm fucking Greek.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Middle aged woman, loudly: Spring is in the air, and I'm feeling sprung!
Middle aged husband: Babe, what the hell ya doin?
–Starbucks, Queens
Old woman to old man: So, where are you going?
Old man: To the doctor.
Old woman: Nothing terribly wrong, I hope.
Old man: Nah. (pauses) I'm just having trouble breathing, is all.
–Q49 Bus, Jackson Heights
Ghetto fab bus driver : Hello and good morning. Welcome to the Bolt Bus, my name is Jacques and I'm going to be your operator today. We do appreciate your business. Well, I appreciate your business. For my nails. Getting my hair done. Yeah.
–BoltBus
Overheard by: Julie and Mark The Snob
Bus driver (as bus leaves Lexington stop): The stop after this stop will be the next stop.
(as bus turns into Central Park) Ladies and gentlemen, the next stop will be Central Park West. Please have your passports ready.
–Crosstown Bus
Bus driver over intercom (as bus passes Unisphere): Oh, everyone's from New York? Then y'all already know this spot! I can't tell you nothing! Bye.
–Shuttle Bus, Flushing Meadows Park
Conductor: Good morning! This is the bus dispatcher. It's a sunny 78 degrees on a beautiful Wednesday! I'm happy to report the bus lanes inbound to New York are slicing through traffic like a hot knife through butter! Enjoy your day, control center, out.
–NJ Transit Bus
Overheard by: Jerzey…CloseEnough
Conductor: Alright folks, remember to keep cool today and drink plenty of water. I recommend ya'll eat some Honey Nut Cheerios. Honey Nut Cheerios will make ya'll nicer to each other. Stay away from that bacon and eggs. Too hot. Yes, Honey Nut Cheerios. Have a nice day.
–B61 Bus
Overheard by: should have eaten breakfast
