She Needs a Change After All the Big Black Men

Girl #1: What’s with all the little white men?
Girl #2: The Navy guys?
Girl #1: White, Jesus.
Girl #2: What?
Pause
Girl #1: In those little costumes… don’t you just want to jump them?

–34th & Lexington

Overheard by: love them sailors

Posted on January 16, 2023
Colors, Friends, Horny, Murray Hill and Gramercy, Sex, Stupidity

And Then She’ll Need Stitches

Woman #1: So I told him, “Nigga, you can’t touch none of this!”
Woman #2: Ha, ha. Girl, what you need is a horse dick!

–125th & Lexington

Overheard by: Johnny Tremain

Posted on January 12, 2023
Anger Management, Body Parts, Ghetto Chicks, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Upper East Side

Wednesday One-liners Are Unclean…Unclean!

Girl: I can assure you…that at my apartment…there will be soap!

–39th & 6th

Posted on January 6, 2023
Body Parts, Brooklyn, Central Park, Dating, Fashion, Getting Off, Health and Hygiene, Hipsters, Manhattan, Masturbation, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Should've Used a Condom, Soho, Suits, Tourists, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

If Youth Only Knew; If Age Only Could

Guy: Your fly is unzipped.
Girl: Oh…
Oldish lady: Easy access, kid! Goodness, you should be fucking already!

–Christopher St

Posted on January 5, 2023
Clothing, Girls, Guys, Old People, Sex, West Village

Time to Take a Break from the Studying

Guy #1: I’d totally hit that.
Guy #2: Dude, I’d hit that so hard whoever could pull me out would become the King of England.

–College Walk, Columbia University

Overheard by: King Arthur

Posted on December 18, 2022
Columbia, Columbia (& Barnard), Guys, Sex

Not Even the Women's Studies Professor Is Safe From Gina and Ashley's Critique

Student #1: I don't know why that bitch has such a big ego, she's fucking ugly.
Student #2: Yeah, I know, but she thinks she's Paris Hilton or some shit.
Student #1: She's probably getting fucked by some loser.

–St. John's University

Overheard by: kapnasty

Headline by: Leema

Runners-Up:
· “…And Taping It to Launch Her “Career”” – LOLa
· “And I’m Taping It” – Victor
· “Hey, Don’t Call My Dad a Loser!” – PeterG
· “How Guys Interpret the Twilight Books” – john
· “Just Another Day Behind the Scenes Of “The View”” – Yobojo
· “Throw in a Chihuahua and a Coke Habit…” – someday, I could be that loser

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Posted on December 9, 2022
About Celebrities, Beauty, College, Headline Contest Winners, Insults, Physical appearance, Sex, Students

That’s More of a Reflection on You

Head waiter: I’m sorry sir, but you can’t smoke in here.
Cigarette guy: I can’t smoke in here? Next thing you’ll tell me I can’t fuck in the bathroom.

–Cipriani’s, 42nd Street

Overheard by: trey constant

Posted on November 23, 2022
Assholes, Compare/Contrast, Customers, Restaurants & Cafes, Sex, Smoking, Waiters

…And Potentially Fuck You?

Skater: Come on. Hang out.
Murray Hill-looking PR-type chick: Fuck you! You're a fag! You'd rather hang with your loser friends in this fucking rat hole? I would have fucked you, if you just came to Manhattan but…
Skater: C'mon hang. It'll be cool.
Murray Hill-looking PR-type chick: Oh, fuck this. I'm taking this cab. Have fun sucking your buddy's cock, asshole!
Skater, after watching her leave: Fucking bitch! (pauses, then asks perfect stranger) Hey, can I buy a cigarette from you?

–12th St & Bedford