Tween: I just didn't think it would be so…gooey.
Tween friends, in unison: Ew!
–Barnes & Noble, Bayside
Overheard by: bookseller
NYU bimbette #1: I swear, everyone at NYU is gay.
NYU bimbette #2: Oh, I know exactly what you mean.
NYU bimbette #1: No, I mean, like, everybody — like 40 percent.
–Veselka, 9th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Bean
Cashier: What can I get for you?
Customer: Yeah, I want two Crave Cases with burgers.
Cashier: Will that be hamburgers or cheeseburgers?
Customer: What’s the difference?
Cashier: The cheeseburgers have cheese.
–White Castle, 36th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: waiting for the food of the gods
Woman #1: It was so funny. I mean I was talking to the horse in English, and the horse didn’t understand a fucking word I said.
Woman #2: It was a Spanish horse.
Woman #1: Even their dogs, they didn’t understand English. I don’t get that.
–QM2 bus
Overheard by: i’m mr.ed
Tourist lady: Oh my god! Oh my god! That’s ground zero!
–Construction site, 42nd & 6th
Boyfriend: It’s called Taormina.
Girlfriend: Tromina?
Boyfriend: No, Taormina.
Girlfriend: Tarmina?
Boyfriend: No, tah-or-min-ah.
Girlfriend: Ta-roh-min-ah?
Boyfriend: How can you not say this? We’re fucking Italian!
–Mulberry St, Little Italy
Thug #1: Man, it’s Spiderman!
Thug #2: Ask him if he real.
Thug #3: If he’s real, why he be in front of Toys “R” Us, nigga?
Thug #2: I dunno — maybe he don’t got a movie to be in right now.
–Toys “R” Us, Times Square
Chick #1: So, you transferred to CUNY-Hunter?
Chick #2: Yeah. My last school was making me stupid and drunk, and I can’t be a lawyer like that… Look at you, little big knuckles!
–Q train
Girl #1: Was he a virgin?
Girl #2: Yeah, I think so.
Girl #1: I bet. He totally needed a new haircut.
–Uptown Lounge, 3rd Avenue
Stoner: We’re on the verge of a spiritual revolution. It’s like Fight Club…but without the violence.
–Union Square
Overheard by: braun bowery
Guy: The fact that bar was full of ugly girls is just ridiculous.
–Union Square
Crazy lady: Fine, stay where you are, Linda! Stay on the streets, stay in the gutter…but put all your stuff away!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Jen
Woman: If I die of malaria, you can have my DVD player.
–Union Square
Lady on cell: …so what’s the difference between the East Village and the West Village?
–Union Square
Overheard by: feitclub
Guy on cell: I didn’t throw the lamp at you because I was out of control, I threw the lamp at you because you said I was out of control.
–Union Square
Overheard by: John
Guy: Dude! At least you’re getting head. Bad head is better than no head, any day of the week!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Joy Smoker
