Ghetto woman: She raped a 12-year-old boy?
Ghetto man: Yeah, she just opened the door and grabbed him and started fucking him.
Ghetto woman: Damn, that nigga probably went back and told all the Boy Scouts!
–6 Train
Overheard by: Skyler Fox
Ghetto woman: She raped a 12-year-old boy?
Ghetto man: Yeah, she just opened the door and grabbed him and started fucking him.
Ghetto woman: Damn, that nigga probably went back and told all the Boy Scouts!
–6 Train
Overheard by: Skyler Fox
Drunk girl #1: You can buy the morning after pill with your ID now!
Drunk girl #2: Yeah, I was think about buying a hamster from PETCO now that I'm old enough!
–3rd Ave & 13th St
Teen: I'll get us a cab.
Grandma: Let's just walk, it's only a few blocks from here.
Teen: Are you sure? What about your hip?
Grandma: Well, it hurts, dear, but I'm not going to be a pussy about it.
–57th St
Woman to younger boyfriend: Honey, that Chinese food that you brought over is still in my fridge. I was going to throw it out.
Younger boyfriend: No, I'll eat it.
Woman: You don't think it's gone bad?
Boyfriend: It's only two days old. You're 31, and you haven't gone bad yet.
Woman: That makes no sense, and in any event, you haven't eaten me in a while either.
–Upper East Side
Thug #1: Nigga, you all old-like 'n shit. You be like, sixteen goin' on sixty.
Thug #2: Me?! Nigga, you got that shit all backwards. Look at Jerome. He be sixteen goin' on dead.
–Fulton & Nassau
20-something #1: You are so different than you were in middle school!
20-something #2: I know, I just quit smoking.
–68th & Columbus
Overheard by: Allison
Guy: Okay, we can invite him too, but you have to remind him that pants are a requirement, not a mild suggestion.
–Uptown 2 Train
Middle aged man at the end of police show (exhausted from dancing around the suite all night): Wow, I can't believe I kept my pants on!
–MSG Skybox
Overheard by: Russ Beef
Man to friend: And like, man I wasn't gonna drink anything, but I smoked like one hundred blunts and was so high and I was like taking my pants off and shit.
–1 Train
Overheard by: batou187
Ghetto guy to ghetto friends: I remember the day I got my Reeboks like I remember the day that I peed my pants…when I was too old to pee my pants.
–A train
Overheard by: Hannah
Guy on phone: I think that may be slightly humiliating though, if the pants actually come off. And someone feels the chicken cutlets inserted in your underpants for some added power.
–19th & 8th
Overheard by: Joey
Middle-aged woman (excitedly): So I met a great 75-year old man!
Middle-aged man (also excitedly): Are you going to marry him?
–W 13th St b/w 5th & 6th Ave
Overheard by: NYU girl
Older thug to hot teen walking by: I started commitin' sins when you was still playin' with barbies.
Hot teen: (gives him the finger)
Older thug (singing): “They tried to make me go to rehab and I said no no no…”
–Broadway & Madison
Overheard by: Anne
Guy on cell: I'm 35. What? That's too old for you? Age ain't nothing but a number, baby. And, I work sometimes too. And I don't smoke. Well, I smoke, but I don't smoke smoke, ya know. And, I've only been in jail once, but that was a long time ago and I've learned. I even read now.
Girl nearby to friend: See, I told you signing up for match.com would be a bad idea. You can never tell who'll answer your ads.
–Atlantic Ave & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Susan
