Crazy guy: Hello.
Girl: Hi.
Crazy guy: You know, yesterday I had a nervous breakdown. My girlfriend kicked me out of the house forever.
Girl: Oh…
Crazy guy: It was nice talking to you. Bye.
–Union Square
Crazy guy: Hello.
Girl: Hi.
Crazy guy: You know, yesterday I had a nervous breakdown. My girlfriend kicked me out of the house forever.
Girl: Oh…
Crazy guy: It was nice talking to you. Bye.
–Union Square
Blonde girl: I mean this in the nicest way possible, but she looks exactly like Chris Farley.
Brunette girl: Oh my gosh, you're so right! I can't believe I never noticed before!
Blonde girl: I know! But I totally mean it as a compliment.
–Nobu Restaurant, W 57th
Overheard by: sromeo
Waitress #1: Do you have any tampons?
Waitress #2: Yeah, I have regular and super.
Waitress #1: Are they the plastic kind? The cardboard snags my vagina.
–Restaurant, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Unappetized
Gay guy #1, checking out another guy: That's a cute outfit.
Gay guy #2: Not with that face.
–6 Train
Overheard by: Oobs
Conductor (after doors close at Rector St): If you are in the last five cars you will not be getting off at South Ferry. (train starts to move) Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Shoulda listened to directions.
Passenger: Is anyone else hearing this?
–1 Train
Overheard by: ryn
Woman #1, with water bottle in paper bag: I don't understand why they gave me a bag. What's the point of putting just a water bottle in a bag?
Woman #2: You should've just told them you didn't want one.
Woman #1: Yeah, but I didn't notice until he put it in.
(pause, then both women snicker)
–Elevator, 8th Ave
Overheard by: Mariah
Mom to tween daughter: Are you mad at me?
Tween daughter: No, I'm not mad at you.
Mom: Why aren't you mad at me? You have every right to be.
–NJ Transit
Nine-year-old girl: Are you a Republican or a Democrat?
14-year-old girl: Well, I'm a Democrat.
Nine-year-old girl: Why?
14-year-old girl: Well, in my opinion, being a Democrat means you don't like Bush.
Nine-year-old girl: Oh. I'm a Democrat, too.
–Brooklyn Public Library, Greenpoint Branch
Overheard by: Jack Jackl
Man collecting money: One penny, one penny! No one should be hungry!
Little child: You're wrong! Stop saying that!
–Waverly & University Place
Overheard by: Obviously a Republican
Wannabe rap superstar: Yo, wanna buy this CD?
Middle aged white guy: What are the beats like?
Wannabe rap superstar: (silence)
Middle aged white guy: Are they like (starts beat-boxing)?
Wannabe rap superstar: No. (leaves)
–96th St & Amsterdam
Overheard by: sure they weren't
