It’s a Second Chance for You to Pretend Not to Notice the Smell

Man #1, trying to make the elevator door before it closes: Don’t you guys believe in second chances?
Man #2: Did you have beans for lunch?

–188 Montague, Brooklyn Heights

Posted on August 5, 2019
Brooklyn, Default, Elevators, Farting & Burping, Food, Men, Questions, Scents of the City

No-Legged Hobos: “We Feel Sorry for Staten Islanders”

Girl #1: No one likes him… I feel bad for him.
Girl #2: I feel bad for the homeless people in the city who have no legs.

–Staten Island Mall

Posted on July 23, 2019
Body Parts, Compare/Contrast, Default, Girls, Homeless, Malls, Staten Island

Why Pillbox Hats Are Making a Comeback

Preppy girl: I wonder why celebrities do so many drugs.
Queen: Honey, you can only buy so much couture.

–F Train

Posted on July 23, 2019
About Celebrities, Default, Drag queens, Drugs, Fashion, Girls, On the Subway, Preppies, Shopping

It’s Poorly Decorated — No Gays

Old man #1: I don’t know what happened! The other day I was 22 years old. Time really goes by, doesn’t it?
Old man #2: It sure does… I’m 76.
Old man #1: That is good… I hope heaven is nice.

–PATH station, 9th St

Posted on July 22, 2019
Age/Aging, Default, Men, Old People, Religion, Train Station, Wishes & desires

Mostly CNN

Seven-year-old boy: You know Britney's on crack, she's on crack. And your girl Lindsay is so going to jail for selling cocaine. That Britney is crazy.
Aunt: That boy watches too much TV.

–LIRR

Overheard by: I think lindsay is going to jail too

Posted on July 20, 2019
About Celebrities, Boys, Cocaine, Crime and Punishment, Default, Families, Hard Drugs, Kids, Long Island, Prison, Trains Not Subway, TV, Women

Or She’s Participating in Some Sort Of Emotional Scavenger Hunt

Middle-aged girl #1: Yes, she was sincerely apologetic for the things that she’d done, and she really took responsibility for them.
Middle-aged girl #2: She must have a new therapist.
(both nod sagely)

–1 Train

Overheard by: Suze V

Posted on July 16, 2019
Apologies, Compare/Contrast, Default, Girls, On the Subway, Psychology

Frankly, That Could Have Been What He Said

Train conductor: (mumbling)
British suit: So you understood what he just said?
New Yorker: Of course.
British suit: Well, what did he say?
New Yorker: He said, “Shut the fuck up, you fucking foreigner, you're on a train and you'll be home soon.”

–1 Train

Overheard by: KeivonK

Posted on July 16, 2019
Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, Brits, Default, Insults, Language Barrier, On the Subway, Public Transportation, Questions, Suits

It Doesn't Count As “Sex” Til I Get My Period

12-year old girl: Just because we watch porn together doesn't mean we have sex together.
12-year old boy: Stop lying, you whore.

–Mulberry & Canal

Overheard by: Tara G

Posted on July 14, 2019
Boys, Chinatown, Compare/Contrast, Default, Girls, Insults, Lies, Porn, Sex, Tweens

Isn’t It One of the Words on the Statue Of Liberty?

Student: I tried to write my Spanish essay but I don’t know how to say “bitch” in Spanish.
Professor: You live in New York and you don’t even know that?

–Brooklyn College

Overheard by: Guy

Posted on July 11, 2019
Brooklyn, Brooklyn College, Default, Education, Insults, Languages, Only in New York, Students, Teachers/Professors, Words

Coincidentally, He Doesn’t Consider It Cheating When It’s with a Guy

Girl #1: Are you gonna tell him?
Girl #2: Well, I don’t consider it cheating when it’s with a girl… so no.

–23rd & 7th

Overheard by: vaduz

Posted on June 30, 2019
Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Default, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Infidelity

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