Thug #1: Yo, son, yo’ face looks like a fucked-up pony, son!
Thug #2: Shit, son.
–Post office, 60th St
Thug #1: Yo, son, yo’ face looks like a fucked-up pony, son!
Thug #2: Shit, son.
–Post office, 60th St
White trash woman to angry boyfriend: Stop! I'm in my car and I love myself! I love myself! Fuck you if you don't love yourself! Tyra says to love yourself, and I love myself!
–49th & 11th
Conductor: Passengers, as you all know the New Haven line is known as the Love Line, because of our red colors and red schedules. For Valentine's Day why not buy a loved one a ticket? Nothing says "I love you" like a Metro North ticket! Imagine the look on your mother-in-law's face when she opens up her present to find a one way trip to Manhattan!
–Metro North Train
Sorority girl: And this is a list of all the girls who love Jell-o.
–St. John's University
Overheard by: Peter G
Guy on Bluetooth: What did I say? I said I love you and you didn't fucking say anything back. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?
–Jackson Heights
Excited black guy to friend: Damn! I think I'm in love, she's like the whole package! She's pretty, she's fuckable, and she can cook!
–A Train
Overheard by: Tim
Little boy leaving the church: Bye, Jesus! I love you!
–Riverside Church
Overheard by: Stephanie
Hungover girl #1: I can't believe how wasted we got last night.
Hungover girl #2: I know, I feel like shit. It's a nice day though.
Random neighbor: Oh… look! It's the two drunk girls that cursed me out last night.
Random neighbor's girlfriend: What did you do?
–Upper East Side
Chick #1, pointing at man leaving: That guy’s fly was open the entire ride.
Chick #2: Wow, you’re so observant. You notice everything.
Chick #1: I’m just really superficial.
–L train
Little boy: Are you from Florida?
Southern man: No, Tennessee, why?
Little boy: You sound like a cowgirl.
Southern man: I really don’t think Florida has any cowgirls.
Little boy: Well, you still sound like one.
–Nelson Ave & 168th St
Thuggish 12-year-old kid: I can so beat you at UNO.
Thuggish 10-year-old brother: Fuck you.
–L Train
Young girl to friend, after cutting in front of her: Ladies first!
Friend: You ain't no lady, you stupid fucking bitch!
Young girl: See, point proven!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: rick
20-something Puerto Rican on cell: We're walking to the court right now. Yeah, he is an asshole, she's gonna get an order of protection.
20-something black woman, yelling: Yeah, I am tired of his violent shit!
20-something Puerto Rican: Uh-huh, but we're gonna get a patty first. She's hungry.
–Jamaica Ave & 153rd St, Queens
Overheard by: walking to court
Angry man on street: Fuck ass the ball! Fuck ass the ball!
Bystander: Did he just say, “fuck ass the ball?”
–Bed-Stuy
Little girl to father, about pedestrian sign: But I don't want to be a pedestrian! I want to be famous!
–17th & Irving
(pedestrians are crossing when they aren't supposed to. One almost gets hit by a taxi)
Female traffic cop to taxi driver: Next time, just go ahead and run them over.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: momes
Homeless man directing traffic in middle of street: I killed 20,000 people, I ain't afraid of no car! I killed 20,000 people, I ain't afraid of no car!
–Jerry Orbach St
Gangster walking in front of Range Rover: Fuck it, if I'ma getting hit by a car, I'ma getting hit by a nice car.
–Broadway & Houston
Tourist driving car: I don't give a fuck if you own the world! I'm running your ass over!
–Financial District
Overheard by: lex
