Nine-year-old girl #1: You don't know what it's like because your father didn't die.
Nine-year-old girl #2: Yeah, I never had a father.
Nine-year-old girl #1: Yeah, so he never died. Hey, you wanted to rent a movie tonight…what do you want to see?
–Bedford Ave & N 6th St
Overheard by: Andrew
Little girl in stall with her mother: Are you going to go?
Mother: No.
Little girl: You aren't going to go?
Mother: No.
Little girl: You aren't going to go?
Mother: No, I don't have to go.
Little girl: But you said you had to go!
Mother: I changed my mind.
Little girl: That's not something you can change your mind about!
–Ladies' Room, Saks Fifth Avenue
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Woman: We gotta get yogurt for the kids, too.
Man: I got yogurt.
Woman: Yeah, Activia. You can't be giving kids Activia! Kids already be shittin' like mad!
–Costco, Brooklyn
Little boy, pointing to staircase leading to basement: Daddy, what's downstairs?
Dad: Hell.
–Clothing Store, NoHo
Excited man on cell: Hey! Did you hear who died? Amanda's pretend husband died!
–N Train
Overheard by: Tophs
20-something woman to friend: Well, I wanna kill her and she wants to kill me, 'cause I took her husband.
–R Train
Overheard by: Tara
20-something hipster girl: I am a nihilist! Watch me die.
–Waverly & Mercer
Asian guy to white girl: All children are born evil. If they had the strength of an adult during childhood, they would kill someone just to get a lollipop.
–Queens College
Woman on cell: Okay! I get it. She's not a good person. Just kill her.
–Canal St & Laffaette St
Overheard by: Kay
Conductor: You're all gonna die! I'm your worst nightmare! Ahahahaha!
–C Train
Overheard by: P-Diddy
Little girl to woman walking by: Oh, look–another person, sooooo interesting. It's not like we haven't seen enough of those today.
–D'Agnostino's, Greenwich & Barrow
Overheard by: Margo
Boy walking in church to mom: And when we walk in we'll hear Gregorian chants.
–Trinity Church
Four-year-old boy, after plane's smooth landing: Whoa, that was solid!
–JFK Airport
Overheard by: jen
Kid at birthday party: I thought they were feeding us ice cream, not shit!
–McDonald's, Bayside
Adorable child having a temper tantrum: I don't want to walk, I want to go in the stroller!
(mother ignores him) I'm melting… I'm meeelllting!
–New York Transit Museum
Overheard by: NatalyaPetrovna
White woman with two kids: Oh my god! Look! These lollipops are designed to look like the faces of little white children!
Asian woman: Yeah–they're made of molded chocolate.
White woman: I love Asian grocery stores!
White woman's kid: Mommy, mommy! Can I have it? I want to eat the white child!
–New Kam Man, Canal St
Overheard by: office peon can be wary of white people
Black nanny #1 to another, about white baby in her care: Her mother tells me to put sunscreen on her, but she's so damn white.
Black nanny #2: I know, nigger looks like Casper.
–Battery Park Playground
Overheard by: Ana O
Child: Do I get a cupcake too?
Mother, to group of small children: You all get a cupcake, no matter how horrible you are!
–Lincoln Square
Overheard by: Bee
Mother to seven-year-old daughter: We take the A to 168th Street and then the 1 to 231st.
Daughter: Ah! Don't you just love travel!
–Uptown A Train
